More from The Web Witch's Blog
The year flies by when you're postpartum, sleep-deprived and your little bubba is suddenly on the move and making developmental leaps. Time is this sort of weird compressed experience, not dissimilar to the way I felt about COVID and 2020 (wasn't that just yestersday? No indeed it was not, it was 6 years ago). And I'm a bit discombobulated as September is upon us. Budget planning at work? Didn't I just do budget planning for 2026? I went back to work in June, which has been an adjustment and prompted many an identity crisis, but at the same time I am happy to be back and doing lots of soul-searching. I'm in a better place than the start of the summer. Part of the soul-searching has been prompted by AI and the state of tech that I re-entered into. I still hate how it is being shoved down our throats and the prioritization of data centers, especially in places experieincing drought. Everyone should have access to water and humans should be prioritized over a data center. Full stop. For my current role, it has been extremely helpful in speeding up mundane tasks like compiling reports, and giving me more time to spend on things like design and social media content, which I historically had barely enough time for. But I continue to be baffled by AI and its bubble. The IPO valuations seem wildly ridiculous, and I've seen the salaries offered to people and I wonder how it is even remotely sustainable. I also hate the fearmongering and the polarizing content ("AI is going to replace [your industry of choice here]") to create engagement bait that has come with the commercialization of this technology. It is a horrible and interesting time in tech. I have seen many qualified people laid off because of "cost-cutting", and it's not right. Summer Bits # We survived multiple heatwaves in South East England, and while I'm told there were four, it really felt continous up until a week or two ago. I've kept the windows open and the house chilly in the morning because it is a relief. The first heatwave in May was stressful as hell, with Chloe about to be 5 months and trying to keep her cool while our upstairs rose to 28 C. The number of parents lamenting online about the lack of knowledge sharing in prenatal classes about how to keep a baby cool in hot weather was more than zero. We all knew the safe sleep guidelines said 17-21 C but wtf are you supposed to do when you can't get any part of your house that cool? It was stressful and horrible, but it's over for now. I think. My dog Vogue has had health issues since last October and we have finally got to a point where I have not had to take her to the vet in about a month or so. She's on heart meds and has mitral valve heart disease. Her heart is quite enlarged but we're managing. She rides in the bottom of Chloe's pram for walks so she still gets to go out and about. I love her to bits, I can't believe she's 14 and I cherish the time I have remaining with her. The Patio # While it became increasingly apparent that we will need more space when Chloe is older, I decided to make the most of what we have and asked our landscapers to put a patio in off the back of the house, and they finished it in early July. It has become a daily sanctuary, and I'm sad the nights are getting shorter. There was a good 3-4 weeks when we were outside eating dinner. Yorkshire Coast # We didn't leave the country this year for my birthday. I can't remember why it didn't quite work out, but we took our first overnight trip with Chloe up to the Yorkshire Coast and Whitby. It was beautiful and by the time we eventually found our groove with Chloe and naps and going out to do things, it was already time to leave. I love the sea, and it was lovely to be along the coast for a few nights. Will hopefully make a more permanent move along a coastline at some point. Family coming to visit # My mother came to visit for 3 weeks and help with Chloe which was so lovely for her to get that time bonding with her granddaughter. She also got to see Chloe make some big development leaps even in the short time she was here. Then my sister came and stayed with us for a week. We went to Wrest Park, London and Warwick Castle and Chloe loved it all. I only wish both my mom and sister could have stayed longer. What I've been... # Watching # A lot of reality TV. I've just been hella into Bravo shows more than usual. Ladies of London: The New Reign - It was the best Bravo show I've watched in a long time. Interesting characters who felt more authentic than Real Houswives. I am gutted it was not renewed. I want more of Mark and Martha! The Valley - More reality TV. Oddly comforting as the new season started when I was 3-4 months postpartum and two of the women on the series were also at that stage of postpartum so it made me feel a bit normal and seen. House of the Dragon - Season 3 was way better than 2. Rooster - Love a Steve Carrell show. It was different. I enjoyed it. Dutton Ranch - Ridiculous and outlandish like Yellowstone but entertaining. And it's Premier League season again babyyyy. Though I am extremely sad Arsenal sold Trossard. Boooo. But I'm thrilled there has been so much football on. Reading # Ha - it is taking me months to finish books at this particular moment in time. Glad I read so many last year. I did finish Crescent City #3 House of Flame and Shadow back in April. I started Brimstone (Fae & Alchemy #2) but could not stay engaged, so I DNF. I know book one was ripped apart because of the writing, but I was entertained. I couldn't look past the writing this time. I am currently making my way through the first book of Dungeon Crawler Carl. Other Bits # In this process of soul-searching and finding my identity as a mother, I am back to the state of mind prompting me to ask "why not?" when something comes up. So I bought a Pioneer DDJ-FLX4 to learn how to DJ and have been rediscovering the music I so love at festivals and feeling re-energized about something new. I'm loving mixing and am excited to see where this takes me. I've also decided to go back to school. Not your normal school though. I have become deeply interested in astrology and am going to pursue that for fun. Looking forward to being in a classroom setting again. Because why the hell not?
I started work back up again yesterday, June 1, as a remote tech worker for an open source consultancy. My husband started his paternity leave today. I'm only going back part-time for the moment so my rough plan is to work 3 days a week with the exception of this week, as I wanted to open my laptop, clear out my inbox, setup my Notion pages for 2026, change my away message and just try to get a vague sense of what's happened while I've been away. I'll work Monday-Thursday but Monday and Tuesday will be half days. My goal for the day was to get up with Chloe at 6:00 AM like normal. Put her down for her nap at 7:30. Have Jhey take over while I take the dog to the vet for heart scan and then log on for a little bit this afternoon. The universe said, a plan with an almost 5 month old? Nice try. Chloe woke up at 3:00 AM which is unusual for her. I rocked her back to sleep. Put her down. Tried to crawl back into bed. She woke up, rolled onto her tummy, and cried because she can't get onto her back because she's seemingly forgotten how to do so. She started rolling tummy to back weeks ago, but now that she can go back to tummy...that's all she does. Rinse and repeat until 6 AM. So I'm at that shattered level of tired. So much so that when I take my dog Vogue to the vet and they're telling me the results of her heart scan, it's not processing how poorly her heart actually is until I get home and talk to Jhey. She'll be on medication for the rest of her life. She's 14. We'll do another scan in a month to see if the meds help slow the progression of her heart enlargement and then I'll ask for a potential timeline...how much time they think she has left. Jhey goes to the gym and then someone shows up to pick up his special edition Mustang that he's sold. I get Chloe down for her nap and log on at 2:00 PM. I had briefly logged on for a half hour in the morning to just do a quick check and update. My inbox is a disaster as it seems my out of office reply, replied to spam messages that would normally not be in my inbox and I have 100s to delete. I try to be ruthless and delete as much as possible but leave the more company-wide discussions for follow up. I try and skim the chat. But there's too much. By the time it's 5:00 PM I have barely managed to get my Notion pages set back up. I'll try again tomorrow. I remind myself that today was particularly difficult with scheduling and is not indicative of my days going forward. Tomorrow I'll try for more routine. I go over to Jhey's parents' house and chat, we bring Chloe back for her nap, then bath and bedtime routine. I make a quick dinner of shrimp stir fry with a nice veggie stir fry pack from Waitrose. I almost make it to the end of the Euphoria finale but pass out briefly and then go up to bed. Exhausted but accomplished. Day one of this new life and routine and figuring it out is complete.
And suddenly it happens one day in March. The sun beams down in a rare cloudless sky. It might be cold as the wind gently blows but The Sun. The Sun beams down and it promises Long nights on the horizon. It promises miserable humid days And lovely warm days. Harsh mid-day light. Dreamy golden evenings. It comes out to announce Winter's end before It once again disappears behind England's cloudy skies. And Suddenly Spring is here and my soul is warmed once again.
Note: I started this blog post at six weeks postpartum. It is now eight weeks postpartum as I am finally able to finish and hit publish. Six weeks ago I gave birth to my daughter. In some ways it didn't go according to plan. I had hoped to have a water birth. I imagined arriving to the birth unit and getting in the tub, but if that didn't feel okay then I would get an epidural because my pain tolerance is low and my fear of labor pain was intense. I didn't want to feel it. But we arrived to triage at 8:00 PM on my due date, 14 hours of intensifying contractions. We were sure we would be sent home because I had been timing my contractions and they had gotten further apart as the day went on, but I was in so much pain Jhey lied to triage when he was on the phone with them and fudged the contraction timings. Good thing he did because after sitting in the waiting room and crying out in pain, they whisked me back and told me I was 4 cm and in active labor. I wouldn't be going home. We went off to the birthing suite and I didn't want to move to one with a tub. I was glued to the bed with gas and air asking for an epidural. I never got an epidural. I still am not sure why, but my guess is because of how fast my labor progressed. Jhey was also worried I wouldn't be able to sit still for it. He's probably right. 6 hours later at 2:05 AM, Chloe arrived into the world. I had no complications or any need for interventions. By all means I had a dream labor. The fallback birth plan was for me and Chloe to leave the hospital healthy and alive. We did. The midwives and nurses were all great. I still think of Grace, the nurse who came in when we couldn't get Chloe to settle 24 hours later and knew exactly why. The public NHS ward leaves much to be desired, and your experience depends on who you're sharing a room with. Unfortunately we had the most obnoxious couple who had a caravan of people in and out across from us. And when did it become fine to take all your calls on speaker phone? Everyone around us was on speaker phone for their calls. Why!? Again, the NHS nurses and midwives at Bedford hospital were fantastic but I could not wait to leave. We left the hospital about 36 hours after I had given birth. As I hobbled next to Jhey out to the car in my pajamas while he carried the car seat, I realized all those influencers who post a photo leaving the hospital in their coordinated outfits are full of shit. Anything for the 'gram and the illusion of perfection. I had the most uncomplicated birth experience and was still moving slow (and forget about holding the car seat). The sky was clear and we had left at sunset. It was cold and crisp. As we drove home, I'll never forget the giant full moon that rose in the kind of pink sky you only get during winter sunsets. And then life was completely different. Even my dog Vogue knew when we arrived home from the hospital. I will admit I was not prepared for those first few weeks. They are called the newborn trenches for a reason and there is a reason there are so many people posting on newborn and postpartum subreddits digitally (and probably literally) sobbing about those first days. It is unlike anything I have ever experienced, and while I miss the very new newborn face scrunch and her teeny tiny little self, days feel more manageable already (we're 8 weeks in as I finish writing this post that I started at the 6 weeks mark, lol). The Last Six Weeks # Over the last six weeks I have cried from sleep deprivation. I've wondered what we've done. I've mourned the postpartum experience I will not get because I don't have a village in the UK. I have cried because I can't take Chloe out in her stroller to go for a walk in West Seattle with one of my friends. I have cried because my family is so far away. I've cried. Just because. I have gotten a tiny bit better at asking for help (but still struggle with this and always have.) I am incredibly stubborn and hate sitting still. I was up relatively quickly for walks by week 2 and 3. But it's taken me some time to be okay with the routine of being the primary parent while Jhey is back at work. I've had to be okay with sitting still and letting the countertops be cluttered, with ordering takeout instead of cooking (I love cooking). These early weeks have been an exercise in letting go and mindfulness. But at the crux of it all, despite whatever feelings I may be feeling, at the top there is an overwhelming sense of love that is unlike anything I have felt. I was terrified I wouldn't be able to do the things a parent is supposed to do. I always felt awkward with other people's kids and babies but suddenly instinct kicked in when Chloe arrived and all that worry was for nothing. I have involuntarily become an early morning person again. Similar to the days I would take calls in Seattle at 6:00 AM to catch my team in Berlin and Lithuania, except now my calls are with a tiny human, the most demanding of clients. When her deliverable is late (her bottle), she pitches a fit. But I'd honestly take that any day over being yelled at by a man who's angry over lines of code. Life is different now # There's a part of me that's devastated I have to go back to work in May, even if it's not full time. There's a part of me that can't wait either as I feel a sense of greater purpose. Before Chloe arrived, I didn't realize how much time I was spending, primarily online, and not really doing much. Making plans about side projects and blog posts to write but didn't entice me enough to actually follow through on. Now I prioritize the things I actually want to get done in between cleaning/feeding/changing/putting down for naps/taking care of the dog. The time to dedicate to my things is currently minimal (as demonstrated by how long this post has taken to write). Things are evolving every day and Chloe's first vaccinations are next week so life will evolve even more when I feel comfortable taking her out to places so Jhey and I can get out of the house together for more than just grabbing a bagel or a donut. Life is very different now and my world is making sure this little human, that might actually be an Ewok based on the noises she makes at night, is fed and thriving. Speaking of, she's stirring and squawking from her bassinet, so this is where I'll leave you.
More in programming
This post is a living diary of all the times I messed up something with my website in a funny way. I value those who have the confidence to own their mistakes and share the learning with others, and so this is me doing just that! That Time I Accidentally Made a Tarpit That Time I Accidentally Made Really Large Headers That Time I Accidentally Made a Tarpit Back to Top A "tarpit" is an unofficial term used in computing to describe an intentionally slow response to a request. In these modern times many people are using tarpits as a way to combat the relentless theft of data by AI companies, although there's little to no evidence of that actually being in any way effective. I don't use tarpits, at least not intentionally, but there was that one time when I accidentally created a tarpit and trapped all visitors in it. As I've shared previously, I refuse connections from IP addresses that are blocked or belong to a blocked subnet, and I enforce this firewall during the TCP handshake. The logic here is straightforward: there's no reason to waste resources doing a TLS handshake, accepting an HTTP request, and then rejecting the connection if I already know I'm going to reject it at the earliest step. At the time, the code worked like this: the HTTP server would repeatedly call the Accept() function below expecting a new connection. I've added some comments to help explain the logic. func (l *firewallListener) Accept() (net.Conn, error) { // Accept the connection from the TCP listener. This blocks until there is a connection to accept or the listner was closed. conn, err := l.l.AcceptTCP() if err != nil { return conn, err } // Separate the IP address out from the remote address (which includes the port) ip := utils.SocketStringToIPAddress(conn.RemoteAddr().String()) if ip == nil { return nil, nil } // Check if it's blocked, if so close the connection and return a refuseError if IsBlocked(ip, true) { conn.Close() return nil, &refuseError{} } // Otherwise return the connection on to the HTTP server return conn, nil } If the incoming connection was from a blocked IP then I'd return a refuseError. I need to use a specific error interface because the HTTP server will halt if it encounters a non-temporary error from the call to Accept(), so I need to return an error that satisfies the definition of a temporary error. I defined refuseError like this: type refuseError struct{} func (e *refuseError) Error() string { return "." } func (e *refuseError) Timeout() bool { return true } func (e *refuseError) Temporary() bool { return true } func (e *refuseError) Is(err error) bool { return err == context.DeadlineExceeded } This did accomplish the goal of rejecting connections before the TLS handshake for blocked addresses, but it had one really unintended and difficult to track down side-effect. Accepting connections is done serially, after which servers typically then process that request on a dedicated thread (or in Go's case a goroutine). This means that any delays during the accept loop will block all incoming connection. What I had missed while reviewing the code for Go's HTTP server is that when it receives a temporary error from Accept() is that while it doesn't abort, it does sleep for up to a maximum of 1 second. This sleep blocks the entire server for all incoming connections. You can see a trimmed copy of the code that does this below, with some marks I've added which I will explain. // src/net/http/server.go // Copyright 2009 The Go Authors. All rights reserved. // Use of this source code is governed by a BSD-style // license that can be found in the LICENSE file. for { // (1) rw, err := l.Accept() if err != nil { if s.shuttingDown() { return ErrServerClosed } // (2) if ne, ok := err.(net.Error); ok && ne.Temporary() { if tempDelay == 0 { tempDelay = 5 * time.Millisecond } else { tempDelay *= 2 } if max := 1 * time.Second; tempDelay > max { tempDelay = max } s.logf("http: Accept error: %v; retrying in %v", err, tempDelay) // (3) time.Sleep(tempDelay) continue } return err } connCtx := ctx if cc := s.ConnContext; cc != nil { connCtx = cc(connCtx, rw) if connCtx == nil { panic("ConnContext returned nil") } } tempDelay = 0 c := s.newConn(rw) c.setState(c.rwc, StateNew, runHooks) // before Serve can return // (4) go c.serve(connCtx) } At mark 1 the server calls the Accept() function, this is the exact function that I defined above where I might return a temporary error. At mark 2 it checks if an error was returned, and if so if that error is temporary. If there was a temporary error, at mark 3 it sleeps for an increasing amount of time up-to 1 second, otherwise, at mark 4 it processes the connection on a dedicated goroutine, which allows the server to accept the next connection. I'm not entirely sure why the Go developers added this sleep delay and the change when it was introduced doesn't provide any meaningful insight. Regardless, it caused significant latency connecting to my website when a flood of rejected requests was coming in. It just goes to show how important it is to write meaningful commit messages, because you never know when somebody might come back years later wondering "why was this done?". I sure home I don't come to eat those words later. Coincidentally, you can actually see this happening if you look carefully at one of the metric graphs I shared in my first post about my server's security model: Securing My Web Infrastructure. This is the graph I shared in that blog post and while I didn't know it at the time, the fact that these request spikes all cap-out at around 60 requests per minute was not a coincidence. These requests were not being made with a limit in mind, attackers rarely ever care about things like that, instead it the accidental tarpit I had created. The downside to this was that while the malicious requests were being rate-limited, all requests were being rate-limited, up to a point of taking so long they timed out. The Fix Fixing the issue was relatively straightforward enough. Instead of returning a temporary error to the HTTP server during the accept loop, just don't return anything at all and wait for the next valid connection. func (l *firewallListener) Accept() (net.Conn, error) { for { conn, err := l.l.AcceptTCP() if err != nil { return conn, err } ip := utils.SocketStringToIPAddress(conn.RemoteAddr().String()) if ip == nil { return nil, nil } if IsBlocked(ip, true) { conn.SetLinger(0) conn.Close() continue } return conn, nil } } Now, when the HTTP server calls Accept(), the only time it returns is with a connection from an IP that isn't blocked, or if there genuinely is an error. No more sleep delays, no more excessive timeouts. That Time I Accidentally Made Really Large Headers Back to Top For about 10 years now all major browsers have support for a security feature known as a Content Security Policy or CSP. A CSP is an HTTP header provided by the server that instructs the browser on where it can load assets from, this could be scripts, images, stylesheets, fonts, etc. The objective of using a CSP is to prevent against injected HTML that tries to load assets, such as a malicious Javascript file, from a remote source. With so much user-provided content being available online, it's very possible for this to happen without an attacker compromising the entire web server. CSP protects against that by saying "scripts can only be loaded from these domains". That's a really simplified way of looking at it, anyways. My web server supports injecting the CSP header automatically, but before I go on I need to explain a little bit about the structure of my web server. When an incoming HTTP request is accepted (having passed all firewall checks and assertions), we look at the destination host for the request. This can either be the value of the Host header or as specified during the TLS handshake. We then look at a map of hosts to apps. Apps are just an interface that accept a few methods: type App interface { Cleanup() ReloadConfig() ServeHTTP(rw http.ResponseWriter, r *http.Request) Setup(dataDir string) error Shutdown() } One of the apps is the Proxy app, which is a reverse proxy - it accepts the incoming HTTP request and then proxies it on to another host. This is a very common design, especially with increasingly complex TLS setups. Because each app is unique to a host, and different hosts have different requirements for CSP rules, the proxy app includes a CSP preset that we use to build the header value, or skip it entirely. When the proxy app was going to copy an HTTP request to the downstream host, it would build the CSP header, however there was a slight bug... func (a *App) ServeHTTP(rw http.ResponseWriter, inRequest *ht2.Request) { // --snip -- if a.CSP != nil { a.CSP.ConnectSrc += " " + inRequest.Origin } CopyHttpRequest(inRequest, outRequest, rw, CopyHttpRequestOptions{ Origin: inRequest.Origin, Csp: a.CSP, Cors: a.CORS, AddHeaders: !a.SkipHeaders, UseHTTP3: a.UseHTTP3, InsecureTLS: a.InsecureTLS, }) } I'm really unsure as to what I was doing with the line to append to the ConnectSrc, but the impact is that I'm appending to a variable that lives on the App, rather than a variable that is per-request. This meant that every time there was a request to the app, any request at all, the origin would be appended to the header value. This went on for quite a long time unnoticed and unresolved, largely because I am constantly tweaking and tinkering with my web server, after all, it's how I made having a website fun again. Each time I restarted the server process, the header value would be reset, but only for it to continue to grow and grow. Eventually, after a period of being busy with other matters, the server process stayed running for long enough that the header value grew too large and HTTP clients began to reject it. There is no defined maximum for an HTTP header value, however most HTTP clients use 100KiB, which is perfectly reasonable, and this header value would continue to grow well beyond that. Diagnosing this issue turned out to be difficult as tools like Curl would fail with errors relating to entities being too large, but stopped short of saying what specifically. I eventually used openssl s_client to send an HTTP request by hand and observed my terminal window being filled with a domain name repeated thousands of times. Looking at the commit history, it was really unclear why I added the culprit lines of code. The commit message just says "Improved CSP support". It just goes to show how important it is to write - hey look it's those words I'm now having to eat! The Fix The fix was to just delete those three lines of code. Yup, it really was that simple, and fixing this bug actually made a larger positive impact than I had expected, as it was immediately clear when I fixed the bug by looking at outbound network bytes: So much traffic was being wasted on excessive header sizes. You might look at these mistakes I've made and think "wow, Ian, these are some obvious mistakes, I never would have made them!" to which I say "good for you!" with the utmost sarcasm and disdain. I enjoy making and refining software, and making anything means making mistakes along the way. Each time I make mistakes such as the ones above, I improve my skills of investigation, diagnosing, and repair. Skills that, judging by my peers in the industry, seemingly everyone is quickly willing to throw away because a robot does it "better" than you. Header Image: "Car accident on the Ffestiniog to Bala road. Nobody was hurt" by Geoff Charles, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons.
I owe a lot of my professional identity and success to CSS-Tricks. CSS-Tricks repeatedly gave me the opportunity to write for them. In doing so, they helped to both socialize and normalize accessibility as a mainstream frontend concern. I’m deeply thankful to them for this. The team was also a joy to work with, notably Geoff Graham. He’s a mensch, and one of the nicest people you can interact with in the frontend web space. If you have not been following the news about the site, Kevin Powell has a good video about the whole situation: Content skipped. I’m not speaking on behalf of Geoff, Chris, or others involved with running the current version of CSS-Tricks. I’ve got skin in the game as an author. This is my personal opinion, born of my feelings and beliefs. I think a lot of the web’s infrastructure should be co-ops, and CSS-Tricks is knowledge infrastructure. To that point, I should also point out that the website covers far more than just CSS. The corporate model of ownership can be a risk. If infrastructure is not part of a corporation’s core strategy, it is not a priority. As Kevin’s video touched on, it seems like promotion via owning the frontend content space isn’t part of Digital Ocean’s strategy anymore. It is not that CSS-Tricks does not have value. It is that Digital Ocean cannot see it. It is deeply, tragically ironic to me that Digital Ocean allowed this to transpire. This is because I know for a fact that the techniques and philosophies shared by CSS-Trick authors helped to shape iterations of their product’s UI. Some may be quick to point out that this knowledge now—illegally—exists inside of LLM training data, so the risk of the website going away is mitigated. To this, know that we should be striving to keep resources like CSS-Tricks going. Human creativity is the force that creates new techniques, strategies, and technologies. The web will calcify without voices sharing what they know, forever locking us into endless permutations of a fixed point in time. Unlike corporations, co-ops don’t have to be motivated by profit. By not needing to prioritize growth at all costs it means co-ops can instead prioritize and incentivise things like preservation and cultivation. It is also a successful model of operation, one that even already exists, and flourishes in the tech space. Collective ownership can also serve as checks and balances for, and protection against hierarchical decision-making. I only need to point to the chaotic and aberrant decisions many CEOs in the technology space have been making as of late to demonstrate the value of this approach. Paddy Srinivasan, if you somehow wind up reading this: Save some face and take a big swing. Give CSS-Tricks back to the people who love it.
How can something that “just works” be so annoying? situation We live in Cambridge off a little road down a drive in shared ownership between us and our neighbouring houses. All the utilities are buried under this drive, including the phone line. anticipation Over the last few years we have been canvassed repeatedly by CityFibre saying that they can deliver fibre all way to our house. I saw them digging trenches and leaving tails of purple fibre cladding along nearby roads, ready to hook up all the houses. I thought they would need to do something similar to deliver fibre to us. So when they turned up and knocked on our door, I talked to their salesbods and walked them up and down the drive and pointed out where the existing BT line goes. Then they gave up trying to sell to us. This happened about three times. disaffection We were not eager enough for an upgrade to deal with these impediments. notification A few months ago we were told that CityFibre would soon come and do the upgrade, since there’s a nationwide deadline for turning off the copper phone network at the end of the year. We expected that this would force them to actually plan some digging works, so we talked to our neighbours about it. We were all ready for some huge faff to follow the next visit by the CityFibre bods. installation CityFibre turned up on the promised morning bright and early. To our enormous surprise, a brown fibre housing was already poking out of the ground next to our copper phone line. It had been fed through 50 metres of 5cm duct without us being aware they were even working on the street. Within a couple of hours, the technicians had drilled through our wall, installed the ONT, blown fibre through the unexpected pipe, plugged in the CPE (superficially identical to the old one), and left telling us to anticipate that it might not work properly until tomorrow. activation Around lunch time, the copper phone line stopped working completely. Some faff ensued, switching all our devices over to the new WiFi network. For a while we thought this was the death of our land line, but in the course of debugging other issues, I realised that the router has a built-in VoIP adapter (I don’t think we were told it has a built-in VoIP adapter) so I plugged the phone in and it Just Worked: they had ported our phone number across and everything. Flawless. I was seriously impressed. rumination It has been a few weeks since the switchover, and apart from a couple of horrible Clown-afflicted IoT devices, it has been fairly smooth. What prompted me to write this up was realising that we delayed this upgrade for years because the sales people were not given enough technical information about how the installation process works: the fact that houses typically have a 5cm duct containing the copper lines (probably standard for the last 40 years) and the fact that fibre can be shoved through a few tens of metres without difficulty. And worse, the sales people didn’t have an esclation path for difficult cases: they just gave up instead. From a technical point of view, the installation was impeccable. (I guess the loose 24 hour window for the cutover time was because OpenReach and CityFibre don’t have tight requirements on ISP reconfiguration schedules.) From the sales point of view, it was crap. Maybe it would have gone faster if we offered to switch early without asking if the drive would be a problem? But I guess the difference between “yes!” and “yes, but will this be a problem?” is too much to expect from a minimum-wage door-to-door salesbod whose employer didn’t give them enough information or any escalation path.
I listen to a lot of podcasts, and I like how they fit around other tasks. I press play, lock my phone, and put it down. I’m free to wash the dishes, fold the laundry, or shop for groceries. Unfortunately, more and more information is only published as a video. Technical talks, conference sessions, video essays – they don’t work in an audio-only podcast app. I could convert these videos to MP3 files, but that breaks down the moment a video isn’t pure spoken word. If a speaker says, “Look at this slide” or holds up a diagram, an audio-only file leaves me stranded. I don’t want to give up the podcast player I like, nor stare at a screen for an hour – but I do want the information in these videos. To solve this, I’m abusing my podcast player’s chapter support. This gives me the best of both worlds: I can listen to a video as audio-first, and glance at my lock screen if I need a moment of visual context. The idea: Chapters every few seconds MP3 files can have ID3 metadata, and ID3 metadata can include chapters. A chapter covers a particular time range, and it can have an associated title, description, and cover art. My podcast app of choice is Overcast, which can’t play videos, but it does have robust chapter support. I can jump between chapters, navigate a table of contents, and see per-chapter cover art. To get videos into Overcast, I’m creating MP3 files with a new chapter every few seconds, and the per-chapter cover art is a corresponding frame from the video. As I play the file, I get a slow, stop-motion-like rendition of the original video. If my phone is locked, I can glance at my lock screen and see the current frame in the Now Playing screen. Overcast is developed by Marco Arment, and I got this idea from Forecast, his app for adding chapters to podcasts. In particular, I was struck by its ability to create chapters that don’t display in the chapter list – ideal if I don’t want a table of contents with hundreds of entries. As I was developing my script, I compared my output to the output from Forecast to ensure I was creating the chapters correctly. The code: FFmpeg and Mutagen There are three steps in this process: Convert a video file to an MP3 Extract images from the video at a fixed interval Insert the images as hidden chapters in the MP3 file Let’s go through each in turn. 1. Convert a video file to an MP3 Converting a video file to an MP3 is a single FFmpeg command: ffmpeg -i video.mp4 audio.mp3 This is consistently the slowest step of the process, and I do wonder if I could use different settings or an alternative encoder to make it go faster – but it’s not slow enough to be worth further investigation. 2. Extract images from the video at a fixed interval Extracting images from a video needs a more complicated FFmpeg command: ffmpeg -i video.mp4 \ -vf 'fps=1/5,scale=iw*sar:ih,scale=min(iw\,945):min(ih\,945):force_original_aspect_ratio=decrease' \ thumbnail_%04d.jpg This extracts an image every 5 seconds, downscales any image larger than 945 pixels square (while preserving the original aspect ratio), and saves the results as sequentially numbered JPEG images (thumbnail_0001.png, thumbnail_0002.png, and so on). The key is the -vf flag, which defines two FFmpeg filters: The fps filter selects one frame every 5 seconds (fps=1/5). The first scale filter scales the width based on the sample aspect ratio (scale=iw*sar:ih). Without this filter, frames can be stretched and distorted. The second scale filter scales the input video, preserving the original aspect ratio (force_original_aspect_ratio=decrease), and ensuring the output images fit within 945×945px or the size of the input video, whichever is smaller. My limit is 945 pixels because that’s the largest size that cover art is shown on my iPhone. This filter still isn’t completely correct – it sometimes creates images from portrait videos that are smaller than I’m expecting – but it’s good enough. These are only thumbnails for glancing at, and if I want to change it later, I can always do the image resizing outside FFmpeg. 3. Insert the images as hidden chapters in the MP3 file Inserting the chapters into the MP3 file is more complicated. Although FFmpeg has basic support for ID3 metadata, as far as I know, it can’t insert chapters with per-chapter artwork. Instead, I’m going to reach for Python and the Mutagen library. Here’s the code to add a chapter to an MP3 file: from mutagen.id3 import APIC, CHAP, ID3, PictureType audio = ID3("audio.mp3") with open("thumbnail_0001.jpg", "rb") as f: img_data = f.read() image_frame = APIC(mime="image/jpeg", type=PictureType.OTHER, data=img_data) chapter_frame = CHAP( element_id="chp1", start_time=0, end_time=5 * 1000, sub_frames=[image_frame] ) audio.add(chapter_frame) audio.save() This creates a single chapter that lasts the first 5 seconds (0 to 5000 milliseconds), and the per-chapter cover art is thumbnail_0001.jpg. If we ran this in a loop, we could add images for every 5 second slice of the original video. This code is inserting two frames into the ID3 metadata: The CHAP (chapter) frame contains the timing information, and it can have subframes for metadata like title, chapter art, or associated URL. The APIC (attached picture) subframe contains information about a picture, which can either be a blob of image data or a URL to an image on the web. Normally, you’d also insert a CTOC frame which defines a table of contents, but I don’t want a TOC with hundreds of 5-second chapters, so I’m deliberately not doing this here. This is allowed by the ID3 spec – you’re not required to insert a CTOC frame if you’re using chapters, and you can have chapters that aren’t listed in your table of contents. To work out which frames I needed, I used Forecast to create some chapters by hand, and I inspected their frames. In particular, loading an MP3 and calling Mutagen’s pprint() method shows a human-readable list of frames, and then I could drill into the individual fields: from mutagen.id3 import ID3 audio = ID3("audio.mp3") print(audio.pprint()) I wrapped all this code in a project called glancecast, which allows you to convert a video file with a single command, with optional flags to set the frame length and chapter art size: $ python3 glancecast.py interesting_talk.mp4 interesting_talk.mp3 The process takes a minute or so to complete, most of which is spent transcoding the video file to MP3. The resulting MP3s are usually 40 to 50 MB in size, which is very reasonable. The outcome: How it looks in practice Here’s what one of these “glanceable” podcasts looks like in Overcast and on my lock screen: Maggie Appleton presented this talk over two years ago and it’s been on my “talks to watch” list ever since. Once I put it in Overcast? I listened to it in less than a day. It’s not a lot of extra information, but enough that I can quickly glance down and get the gist of what a speaker is saying. Both views update with a new frame every few seconds, or I can put my phone in my pocket and ignore the screen. I’ve used this approach for half a dozen videos so far, and I’m happy with the results. I expect to keep using it, because I have a long queue of videos I’ve been meaning to watch. If you’d like to try this, check out glancecast for the full code and instructions. [If the formatting of this post looks odd in your feed reader, visit the original article]