There’s a particular scene in an early episode of the Simpsons that I found especially relatable, as a ten-year-old whose main interest was candy. Bart and Lisa wake up the morning after Halloween, so miserable from eating sweets that they can’t even look at their candy pile. When Marge suggests giving the rest of it to needy children, they protest, […]

I forget who pointed this out, but Netflix has a subtle feature where it periodically tries to inspire you to get off the couch and live the life you really want. Whenever an episode of the show you’re watching ends, and the next is queueing up, there’s a moment in which the screen goes black, allowing you to glimpse your […]

You spend your life doing things. Some of the things you do make themselves happen, and some don’t. Sweeping the floor, even if you don’t love doing it, will eventually make itself happen, because you’ll get annoyed by walking through filth every day. Same with things like getting groceries, sleeping, taking out the garbage, and getting dressed. Whether or not […]

Bananas used to be a lot more difficult to eat than they are now. The seeds were huge and plentiful, and ran throughout the flesh of the fruit, which itself was starchier, stringier, and less sweet. Other foods were similarly obtuse. Watermelons, for example — instead of having contiguous pink flesh throughout, the good part was hiding in small, seed-riddled […]