The Oatmeal - Comics...
Baby VS Intimacy
A comic about intimate moments.
View on my website
over a year ago
A comic about intimate moments.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Precession
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The only downside is you have to go in every six...
5 months ago
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The only downside is you have to go in every six months to get spun up.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Feckful
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I hope, dear readers, that I have fecked many of...
7 months ago
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I hope, dear readers, that I have fecked many of you.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Insta
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Please don't email - I am already filled with...
a year ago
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Please don't email - I am already filled with regret about the votey.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Needed
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Sometimes I draw hands so poorly I worry I'll be...
a year ago
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Sometimes I draw hands so poorly I worry I'll be accused of being an AI.
Today's News:
THANK YOU! We are just over a day in and past 250% of our goal. WOOHOO! If you check out the page, you'll see we now have Phil Plait as an...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Daylight
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There, now Nate Silver can stop arguing with...
21 hours ago
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There, now Nate Silver can stop arguing with everyone on twitter.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
The full trailer for my Netflix series just dropped!
View on my website
10 months ago
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Earned
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Kelly didn't like this one, but twitter did, and...
a year ago
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Kelly didn't like this one, but twitter did, and twitter, let me tell you, is very smart.
Today's News:
It's the last day that sales of Bea count toward our NYT bestseller total! The list is normally dominated by major franchises,...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Teleporter
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Just a few more and I can do a book of teleporter...
a year ago
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Just a few more and I can do a book of teleporter humor.
Today's News:
I've spent the last month promoting stuff here, so this is just a reminder to you that it's just me over here and I hate having to promote products. Please...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Theodicy
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On the other hand, the prompt verbal response is...
a year ago
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On the other hand, the prompt verbal response is highly appreciated.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Chipmunks
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Conveniently they just pack the gold in boxes like...
a year ago
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Conveniently they just pack the gold in boxes like that.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Forecast
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That's the official International Sign system...
5 months ago
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That's the official International Sign system imagine for in-the-butt.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Scribe
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You'll be tempted to hit the printer, but then it...
a year ago
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You'll be tempted to hit the printer, but then it might leak blood on your tablets.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - New Word
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Genuinely ashamed how much time was wasted on...
7 months ago
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Genuinely ashamed how much time was wasted on this.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Break it down
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A little Adderall wouldn't hurt either.
Today's...
8 months ago
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A little Adderall wouldn't hurt either.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Milton
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OK OK but I am CORNERING the market on...
a year ago
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OK OK but I am CORNERING the market on Milton-related humor.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Found
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This theory actually makes sense of all holiday...
3 months ago
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This theory actually makes sense of all holiday creatures that manage to visit every house.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - DAD
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You can also be consistent by saying 'Ah, but that...
8 months ago
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You can also be consistent by saying 'Ah, but that was on a Tuesday, which is different.'
Today's News:
Last Place Comics
Boys Club vs Girls Club, Part 2
The post Boys Club vs Girls Club, Part 2 appeared first on Last Place Comics.
2 days ago
The post Boys Club vs Girls Club, Part 2 appeared first on Last Place Comics.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Burial
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They must've felt so in tune with their...
a year ago
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They must've felt so in tune with their environment.
Today's News:
Next Tuesday!
The Oatmeal - Comics...
I posted some new animations
I've posted a couple of new animated cartoons about microwaves, cuddling, and wombats.
View on my...
a year ago
I've posted a couple of new animated cartoons about microwaves, cuddling, and wombats.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Conscious
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Announcing The Universe: Abridged Beyond the Point...
a year ago
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Announcing The Universe: Abridged Beyond the Point of Usefulness! Click this comic or check the blog!
Today's News:
Thank you!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Confession
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She'd actually be into it if he didn't always wear...
a year ago
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She'd actually be into it if he didn't always wear those yellow crocs.
Today's News:
Monday
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bang
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The weirdest thing is when the conscious minds...
a year ago
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The weirdest thing is when the conscious minds start inventing reasons for all of this.
Today's News:
Psst - I'm told Bea Wolf will be highly discounted on Amazon tomorrow and the next day. Stay tuned.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Twin
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The cape cost three dollars, but it's an...
a year ago
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The cape cost three dollars, but it's an investment.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Test
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You are hereby banished from the Internet.
Today's...
4 months ago
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You are hereby banished from the Internet.
Today's News:
PHD Comics
12/14/21 PHD comic: 'To Touch The Sun'
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
...
over a year ago
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
title:
"To Touch The Sun" - originally published
12/14/2021
For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Eat
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Based on a conversation with Phil Plait, whom I...
5 months ago
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Based on a conversation with Phil Plait, whom I wish to associate with the above subject.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Destiny
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Written on the hilt in Latin is 'you will do...
2 weeks ago
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Written on the hilt in Latin is 'you will do okay'
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Suffering
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Please consult yesterday's comments (we have...
a year ago
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Please consult yesterday's comments (we have comments now) for the excellent post by Hans Rickheit.
Today's News:
We have them, like it's the 90s again! Please don't be a dick - I would like to keep moderation light. Also, if you...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Backstory
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Right before you kill Hitler in Wolfenstein, you...
6 months ago
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Right before you kill Hitler in Wolfenstein, you get a 60 hour biography, which deeply enhances the experience.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Lit
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Written after enjoying Children's Fantasy...
8 months ago
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Written after enjoying Children's Fantasy Literature, by Levy and Menlesohn.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Life
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This is the humiliation fetish planet.
Today's...
3 months ago
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This is the humiliation fetish planet.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Jung Science
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The best part of the book is his descriptions of...
2 months ago
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The best part of the book is his descriptions of Freud fainting because Jung didn't believe sex was the cause of everything.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sicky
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Toot toot! Go the trumpets!
Today's News:
Hey! If...
a year ago
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Toot toot! Go the trumpets!
Today's News:
Hey! If you want a signed Bea Wolf or A City on Mars, or Soonish, *or* Phil Plait's new book Under Alien Skies, buy here.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Consciousness
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Some time in the next 10 years, someone's gonna...
a year ago
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Some time in the next 10 years, someone's gonna whoopsie an AGI into existence trying to create a highly multimodal porn-bot.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Leisure
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Sometimes I look out the window and think of how...
4 weeks ago
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Sometimes I look out the window and think of how many babies are now part of a personal brand.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Cortex
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This is why artists and mathematicians were ahead...
5 months ago
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This is why artists and mathematicians were ahead of the curve on madness. You are all us now.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Genius
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Of course then it becomes insulting when the other...
a year ago
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Of course then it becomes insulting when the other person doesn't want nightvision.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Design
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Literally everyone would be happy about this. We...
6 months ago
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Literally everyone would be happy about this. We should be building NOW
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Knowing
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Look the fact that there's a misspelling in the...
a year ago
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Look the fact that there's a misspelling in the votey panel just makes the point more strong.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Control
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I think if we just convince AI that it committed an...
6 months ago
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I think if we just convince AI that it committed an original sin, we can get it to feel guilty.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - AI Humor
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OpenAI, hear me out: instead of nerfing the AI just...
a year ago
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OpenAI, hear me out: instead of nerfing the AI just make it shame the user.
Today's News:
xkcd.com
The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald
9 months ago
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Game
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Some of the kids in my family once invented a...
a year ago
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Some of the kids in my family once invented a version where you had to get one of each color in order to get through the final step, mathematically guaranteeing the game could never end. The didn't mind at all. I feel like there's...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Norms
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Sometimes I read my own comics and they seem like...
a year ago
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Sometimes I read my own comics and they seem like they were written by aliens.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Deer
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Every time I walk into the woods I like to think...
5 months ago
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Every time I walk into the woods I like to think about the millions of creatures currently being killed for food.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Automatic
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I think I finally hit a completely new theodicy. If...
7 months ago
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I think I finally hit a completely new theodicy. If I can draw this out to 200 pages, I could get a divinity degree.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Karma
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I'm not saying I'm into sea-cows, I'm saying *if I...
9 months ago
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I'm not saying I'm into sea-cows, I'm saying *if I were an elephant seal* I would be. Don't act weirded out.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bun
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Employees at the gestation facility appreciate...
5 months ago
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Employees at the gestation facility appreciate having easy access to the park.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Execute
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Hovertext:
Lot of people are gonna say we can't build Star...
6 months ago
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Lot of people are gonna say we can't build Star Trek teleporters, but we can do the first half, which is pretty good.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Immortal
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This led to a remarkably nice discussion in patreon...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
This led to a remarkably nice discussion in patreon yesterday.
Today's News:
6 days!!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - The Rub
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Hovertext:
Wow, uncle murdered your Dad and now you've killed...
9 months ago
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Wow, uncle murdered your Dad and now you've killed your friends and family? That's a real bump in the ol' bowling alley, Hamlet.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Circle
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The cool thing is the rapid mutation of surrounding...
11 months ago
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The cool thing is the rapid mutation of surrounding plants and bacteria, meaning Dad is still changing lives after he's gone.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Name
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No other creature gives itself Latin names. We are...
2 months ago
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No other creature gives itself Latin names. We are unique!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Learn
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Hovertext:
Sitting in detention for having done nothing wrong...
8 months ago
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Hovertext:
Sitting in detention for having done nothing wrong is, however, excellent training for service sector work.
Today's News:
Lovely review for Bea Wolf.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Medieval
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Hovertext:
Is this the one that finally gets all the hatemail?...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Is this the one that finally gets all the hatemail? Is it time?
Today's News:
Final 4 days!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Consciousness
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Guarantee you AI won't sit around moping around the...
9 months ago
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Guarantee you AI won't sit around moping around the nature of qualitative experience - it's just gonna murder your ass.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pino
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Hovertext:
I am prepared for your call Hollywood. It's...
2 months ago
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I am prepared for your call Hollywood. It's time.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Chemistry
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Hovertext:
I'm just saying, it wouldn't be the MOST useless...
a year ago
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I'm just saying, it wouldn't be the MOST useless expenditure of grant money.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - A Family Dispute
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Okay, occasionally they are...
9 months ago
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Hovertext:
Okay, occasionally they are autobiographical.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Co-Op
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Hovertext:
It's a little unfair that he always has God mode...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
It's a little unfair that he always has God mode switched on, though.
Today's News:
Final 4 hours. So relieved to stop posting about it.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Persuade
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Hovertext:
I really don't understand the superpersuader thing....
9 months ago
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I really don't understand the superpersuader thing. At least 1/4 of all humans would let an evil AI escape just to tell their friends.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bound
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Dave Luebke informs me that the upper bound should...
a year ago
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Dave Luebke informs me that the upper bound should just be infinity.
Today's News:
Hot damn an embarrassingly flattering review in Science.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - All
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Happy family life, productive work life, and...
11 months ago
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Happy family life, productive work life, and worldwide hegemony.
Today's News:
Nice review of our space book in WSJ.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ants
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Hovertext:
You're in pillar of salt territory here,...
5 months ago
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You're in pillar of salt territory here, bro.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ritual
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I'm not saying you should do this, only that it'd...
5 days ago
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Hovertext:
I'm not saying you should do this, only that it'd be awesome.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Research
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Hovertext:
I have this fear that one day an all-powerful AI...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
I have this fear that one day an all-powerful AI will be able to examine a statement you made and determine precisely where you got the information and it will be the most shame-filled moment of your life.
Today's News:
Very sweet...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Family
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Hovertext:
The Queen frowns upon vacation days.
Today's News:
a year ago
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The Queen frowns upon vacation days.
Today's News:
PHD Comics
10/22/21 PHD comic: 'Current Status'
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
...
over a year ago
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
title:
"Current Status" - originally published
10/22/2021
For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Spidey
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Hovertext:
We are assuming for the sake of argument that all...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
We are assuming for the sake of argument that all bits of human are equivalent, which is basically correct.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Social
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The funniest thing is that all the humans are dead...
a year ago
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The funniest thing is that all the humans are dead and all the talking things at the end are confused robots!
Today's News:
We're a best book of the year!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Investment
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Hovertext:
Slightly worried the wallstreetbets people will not...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Slightly worried the wallstreetbets people will not understand this is a joke. Or, rather, will understand that it's a joke and therefore employ it as a financial plan.
Today's News:
ONE WEEK
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sum
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Hovertext:
Just gently closing the door on ever giving a TED...
7 months ago
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Hovertext:
Just gently closing the door on ever giving a TED talk there. Very nice.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Paradise
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When humans finally step into the Experience...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
When humans finally step into the Experience Machine, their choice of paradise will be heartbreaking.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Better
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Hovertext:
We can't make the world better, but we can make...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
We can't make the world better, but we can make little bits of it pop out of themselves.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Seduction
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Hovertext:
Did you know you can just BUY arcade...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Did you know you can just BUY arcade tickets?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - BAHHH
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Hovertext:
We'll also be doing a bunch of author signings if...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
We'll also be doing a bunch of author signings if you can make it before the show.
Today's News:
Tickets here.
More info here.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Underwear
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Hovertext:
Later this turns out to be foreplay.
Today's News:
9 months ago
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Hovertext:
Later this turns out to be foreplay.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ideology
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Hovertext:
I know the hatemail is coming, but I can't tell...
11 months ago
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Hovertext:
I know the hatemail is coming, but I can't tell from whom...
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Excuse Me
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Hovertext:
Hey Austin, come see me at UT. 1:30pm April 5 2024...
8 months ago
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Hovertext:
Hey Austin, come see me at UT. 1:30pm April 5 2024 RLP 1.302E. I'll be talking space!
Today's News:
Hey Austin, come see me at UT. 1:30pm April 5 2024 RLP 1.302E. I'll be talking space!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Like that
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Hovertext:
Trying to write more realistic dialog these...
5 months ago
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Hovertext:
Trying to write more realistic dialog these days.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Eye
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Hovertext:
I was either that or Jai Ganticpenis.
Today's News:
a year ago
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Hovertext:
I was either that or Jai Ganticpenis.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Hrrrgh
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Hovertext:
Thank you patreons for recognizing that the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Thank you patreons for recognizing that the original caption was basically unreadable.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Behold
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Hovertext:
Any resemblance to any sitting official is a trick...
a year ago
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Any resemblance to any sitting official is a trick of the eye - this is in fact a 2D cartoon drawing.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Secrets
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Kids, you can literally find ways to annihilate all...
10 months ago
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Kids, you can literally find ways to annihilate all humans, but you have to start with algebra!
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Tongue
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Hope this isn't confusing to the Swedish people who...
4 months ago
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Hope this isn't confusing to the Swedish people who can already translate that bubble.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Mans
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English would be so much funnier, for generations,...
a year ago
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English would be so much funnier, for generations, if we made a one-time switch from men to mans.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
The teaser trailer for my Exploding Kittens Netflix series just dropped!
After four years of work, I am finally sharing one minute of glorious footage!
View on my website
a year ago
After four years of work, I am finally sharing one minute of glorious footage!
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sorry
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This is like a time machine to SMBC circa...
3 weeks ago
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This is like a time machine to SMBC circa 2005.
Today's News:
PHD Comics
09/17/21 PHD comic: 'The COVID-19 Virus Explained'
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
...
over a year ago
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
title:
"The COVID-19 Virus Explained" - originally published
9/17/2021
For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Hold Up
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From this angle you can't see the Habsburg...
3 months ago
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From this angle you can't see the Habsburg jawline.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Energy
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Look he's not good at backgrounds but he's trying....
7 months ago
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Look he's not good at backgrounds but he's trying. Give him a hug.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Immortal
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When you add in the Stalin potential it gets really...
8 months ago
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When you add in the Stalin potential it gets really dicey.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sympathy
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This'll be even funnier once SMBC is infinite...
8 months ago
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This'll be even funnier once SMBC is infinite scroll.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Viking
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Surprisingly, Panda War Criminals 3 was the high...
5 months ago
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Surprisingly, Panda War Criminals 3 was the high point in the series.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Help
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Actually maybe this is why prayer works in old...
10 months ago
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Actually maybe this is why prayer works in old books written when there was a smaller population.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Of
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Any word with at least 10 letters is easy to...
3 weeks ago
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Any word with at least 10 letters is easy to remember how to use.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Feelings
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Also, self-destructiveness stops being attractive...
a year ago
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Also, self-destructiveness stops being attractive some time around age 22, but for some reason people keep doing it.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ancient times
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And if you had no dog-bites-ass receiver, it was as...
a year ago
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And if you had no dog-bites-ass receiver, it was as if summer storm had rainbowed the world, yet passed over your home as you dwelt in twilight and sorrow.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bea
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Thanks, everyone. It took about 5 years to get from...
a year ago
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Thanks, everyone. It took about 5 years to get from the beginning to here. It's as a good of a thing as I can write, and I hope you enjoy it.
Today's News:
The most frequently asked question is the age range for Bea Wolf readers,...
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Discrete
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Anyone know if there's a case of partial...
a year ago
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Anyone know if there's a case of partial application of law of the sea?
Today's News:
Come see me! BAHFest London, this Saturday, one night only.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Arc
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We need an arc of History that smashes BOOM right...
5 months ago
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We need an arc of History that smashes BOOM right into Justice.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Cell
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Some people bulk up by eating 12 small bird-cells,...
2 months ago
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Some people bulk up by eating 12 small bird-cells, but they are weak.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Nature
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In a couple years it'll be time for the pro-robot...
a year ago
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In a couple years it'll be time for the pro-robot anti-nature SMBC collection.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Altruism
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This is also why he keeps letting Robin get...
4 months ago
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This is also why he keeps letting Robin get killed.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Epitaph
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Panel 7 is the actual epitaph.
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4 months ago
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Panel 7 is the actual epitaph.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Reflect
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On the other hand, when Jesus wanted to do a...
7 months ago
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On the other hand, when Jesus wanted to do a breakup he just became dead for a few days.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pseudoscience
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Take that, 100 year old method largely no longer in...
a year ago
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Take that, 100 year old method largely no longer in use!
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Optimal
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It's not you, it's me. Statistically. Like 40% you,...
a year ago
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It's not you, it's me. Statistically. Like 40% you, 60% me.
Today's News:
Another review for A City on Mars, this one in Scientific American!
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Snake
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A patreon subscriber points out that there aren't...
a year ago
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A patreon subscriber points out that there aren't any South American pythons, but my defense is that the drawings don't even look like pythons.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Eye
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This is probably why he was so grumpy all the...
a month ago
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This is probably why he was so grumpy all the time.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Challenge
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Later bean guy makes a fortune selling cans of...
a year ago
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Later bean guy makes a fortune selling cans of beans with his label on them. People who hate him are 60% of his audience. He goes on to a university position in media studies.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Symmetry
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Later they place Taylor Swift in a jar of...
a year ago
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Later they place Taylor Swift in a jar of ethanol.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Purity
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The two possible exceptions are Mad Nuclear Physics...
a year ago
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The two possible exceptions are Mad Nuclear Physics and Mad Finance, but they're both toward the top of the curve, OK?
Today's News:
Bea Wolf is half off one day only!
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As I post this, I'm suddenly worried Kris Wilson...
9 months ago
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As I post this, I'm suddenly worried Kris Wilson did it years ago, and if he did well fuck him for putting me in this terrible position.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Joking
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I wonder if any supervillains read Nudge?
Today's...
3 months ago
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I wonder if any supervillains read Nudge?
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sunset
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Hopefully you didn't laugh at this, because if you...
a year ago
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Hopefully you didn't laugh at this, because if you did you're using up around .01% of your laughs on just this one comic.
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Thank you, thank you, thank you, I cannot thank you enough times. The response to Bea Wolf has...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bayesing
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You can't prove me wrong because your proof...
10 months ago
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You can't prove me wrong because your proof requires arithmetic to work.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Muffins
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+10 internet points to anyone who builds this....
a year ago
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+10 internet points to anyone who builds this. -1,000 ethics points, but +10 internet points.
Today's News:
Monnnnnnnday
The Oatmeal - Comics...
Infinity (noun)
A comic about video calls and desperation.
View on my website
over a year ago
A comic about video calls and desperation.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Clapping
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This is actually the answer to most Zen...
2 months ago
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This is actually the answer to most Zen koans.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Experience
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Also what if this IS the experience machine and the...
2 weeks ago
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Also what if this IS the experience machine and the real world is way worse?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Dragons
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Dangle-balls is copyright SMBC Industries, All...
7 months ago
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Dangle-balls is copyright SMBC Industries, All Rights Reserved
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Meaning
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Meaning is for 18 year olds. I'm ready for...
4 weeks ago
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Meaning is for 18 year olds. I'm ready for peace.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Mean
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Yes you can take a mean of meanings for the right...
a year ago
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Yes you can take a mean of meanings for the right meaning of mean.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Brains
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However they're slow because many of them have no...
2 months ago
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However they're slow because many of them have no appendages.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Veiled
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Weirdly, evil Kant requires you to lie to save...
a year ago
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Weirdly, evil Kant requires you to lie to save people from murderers.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sack
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If you used 52 it'd be obvious what the point...
a year ago
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If you used 52 it'd be obvious what the point was.
Today's News:
Click back for today's bonus update. Also buy my book!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Metrics
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The really freaky part is when you hear about this...
a year ago
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The really freaky part is when you hear about this going on in medical research.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Dentistry
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Later the nutritionist is forced to quote from...
a year ago
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Later the nutritionist is forced to quote from revelations about what is to come.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Beeing
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You ever think about how many STDs would go down...
4 months ago
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You ever think about how many STDs would go down with us if there were an AI apocalypse?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - History
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C'monnnnnn hatemail.
Today's News:
a year ago
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C'monnnnnn hatemail.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Geometry
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This joke conceived while reading Tarski's...
a year ago
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This joke conceived while reading Tarski's biography, a fact which will cause four of you to laugh politely.
Today's News:
Hey guys, ask us anything because WE TOOK OVER THE BARNES & NOBLE INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT
xkcd.com
Elementary Physics Paths
'Uhhh ... how sure are we that everything is made of these?'" alt="==COSMOLOGY==> 'Uhhh ... how sure...
7 months ago
'Uhhh ... how sure are we that everything is made of these?'" alt="==COSMOLOGY==> 'Uhhh ... how sure are we that everything is made of these?'" />
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - AGI
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Wait, is fire even possible? Doesn't that violate...
a year ago
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Wait, is fire even possible? Doesn't that violate conservation of fire?
Today's News:
Another ruinously flattering review.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Shell
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Two minutes includes 47 seconds of clothing...
a year ago
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Two minutes includes 47 seconds of clothing removal.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Balloon
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Unfortunately there's no plumber-bot to fix that...
a year ago
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Unfortunately there's no plumber-bot to fix that leak.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Micro
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On the plus side we can harvest them so future...
3 months ago
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On the plus side we can harvest them so future Martians can have microbeads in their soap.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Show
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I believe if we get a fog machine and some cleverly...
8 months ago
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I believe if we get a fog machine and some cleverly placed sheets we can have some sort of sex.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Etymology
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OK, if patreon is any indication, many of you are...
10 months ago
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OK, if patreon is any indication, many of you are confused but four and a half of you are HOWLING.
Today's News:
Last Place Comics
Lasso Man 6
The post Lasso Man 6 appeared first on Last Place Comics.
5 months ago
The post Lasso Man 6 appeared first on Last Place Comics.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Conspiracy
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Remember when conspiracy theories were all about...
a year ago
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Remember when conspiracy theories were all about who was doing it with Sasquatch?
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pro
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Pro Wrestling is the most realistic form of...
6 months ago
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Pro Wrestling is the most realistic form of entertainment, in that nothing means anything, but everyone still gets hurt.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Nag
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Thanks everyone. Social media is finally swallowing...
a year ago
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Thanks everyone. Social media is finally swallowing the whole Internet, so being able to shift to making books my major source of revenue is looking like the best path. Unfortunately, social media doesn't like people linking...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Oh yes
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Ten points if you try this. Fifteen if it ruins...
7 months ago
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Ten points if you try this. Fifteen if it ruins your relationship. Sixteen if it ruins your life.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Dance Dance Dance
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There exist solutions that would work if only you...
a year ago
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There exist solutions that would work if only you could take them seriously.
Today's News:
Merci!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Simulation
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Hovertext:
Go ahead. Remember that moment.
Today's...
a year ago
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Go ahead. Remember that moment.
Today's News:
Remember 20 years ago I started a comic about butts and stuff and now I got a book listed alongside Kip Thorne's? Truly, we're in a weird branch of the multiverse.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - New
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Now eat your goals of green thing!
Today's News:
a year ago
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Now eat your goals of green thing!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Coddled
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It really only gets good in the 4th...
a year ago
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It really only gets good in the 4th edition.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Questions
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Look if we could define it there wouldn't be any...
a month ago
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Look if we could define it there wouldn't be any fun in fighting over it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Mime
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Really this caption can work for any comic.
Today's...
a year ago
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Really this caption can work for any comic.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Indiana
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It's the only Indiana jones that actually takes...
a year ago
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It's the only Indiana jones that actually takes place in Indiana.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - PIE
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If anyone does this, please pour out a glass of...
a year ago
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If anyone does this, please pour out a glass of eggnog antecedent beverage for me.
Today's News:
xkcd.com
Data Quality
[last 4 digits of your cat's chip ID] -> [your cat's full chip ID] -> [a drawing of your cat] ->...
a year ago
[last 4 digits of your cat's chip ID] -> [your cat's full chip ID] -> [a drawing of your cat] -> [photo of your cat] -> [clone of your cat] -> [your actual cat] -> [my better cat]" alt="[exclamation about how cute your cat is] -> [last 4 digits of your cat's chip ID] -> [your...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Monty
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It turns out if you switch to the one that...
a year ago
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It turns out if you switch to the one that definitely for sure has a ferrari you might be worse off because there is information embedded in...
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Un Croissant
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Thanks to patreon subscribers' confusing I have...
a year ago
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Thanks to patreon subscribers' confusing I have color-coded the perverts.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Touch
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The deepest cut is when he pets his cat, raised...
a year ago
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The deepest cut is when he pets his cat, raised from kittenhood for 10 years, and nothing happens.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Kid
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Hovertext:
I mean it's frustrating. Why can't we just select...
9 months ago
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I mean it's frustrating. Why can't we just select the year that the sun swallows the Earth and work backward?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Paw
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Not usually a cat-joke guy, but at least it's only...
11 months ago
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Not usually a cat-joke guy, but at least it's only about 4% of a cat.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Im
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Hovertext:
Is it time? Is it time for the all etymology jokes...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Is it time? Is it time for the all etymology jokes compendium?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - End
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Kelly didn't think this was funny but who cares...
11 months ago
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Kelly didn't think this was funny but who cares what she's thinking about AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT AT...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Addict
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Hovertext:
A little microecon is okay. On weekends.
Today's...
a month ago
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A little microecon is okay. On weekends.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Care
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This accidentally became Bea Wolf for...
a year ago
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This accidentally became Bea Wolf for teenagers.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Dread
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Humans all just get called FC, like it's their...
a year ago
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Humans all just get called FC, like it's their initials.
Today's News:
Last 72 hours!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Paw
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Hovertext:
Suddenly regretting that the paw isn't throwing the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Suddenly regretting that the paw isn't throwing the goat in the last panel.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Grounded
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Hovertext:
But you should see what happened to the...
3 months ago
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But you should see what happened to the first-born.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
Now is your moment to shine
A comic about an eclipse.
View on my website
11 months ago
A comic about an eclipse.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Jawing
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Hovertext:
Massive eternal regret for deciding evolution had...
4 months ago
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Massive eternal regret for deciding evolution had elaborate speech bubbles.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Possible
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It's one of those unstoppable force immovable...
a year ago
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It's one of those unstoppable force immovable object things.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sim
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The characters in the comic are, however,...
2 months ago
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The characters in the comic are, however, absolutely in a simulation.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Dust
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So you'll eat a chicken that does this but you...
a year ago
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So you'll eat a chicken that does this but you won't marry a HUMAN BEING who does? That's called hypocrisy.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Clown World
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A reader once told me that the only canonical...
a year ago
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A reader once told me that the only canonical feature of SMBC is that clowns are a distinct species.
Today's News:
Sorry.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Found
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If you're having trouble, he's roughly in the...
4 months ago
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If you're having trouble, he's roughly in the middle of the page.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Good News
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The silver lining is due to cesium...
8 months ago
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The silver lining is due to cesium contamination.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Split
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No please no emails about how this technically...
5 months ago
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No please no emails about how this technically works in canon.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Replicant
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Inside though, the human is thinking how it still...
6 months ago
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Inside though, the human is thinking how it still beats a real job.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Wolf
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Fortunately they didn't have quantitative finance...
10 months ago
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Fortunately they didn't have quantitative finance yet, so he was just a serial killer.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Temp
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Hey, at least Kelvins would've been worse?
Today's...
10 months ago
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Hey, at least Kelvins would've been worse?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Good
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Why does anything good happen to anyone? We're all...
9 months ago
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Why does anything good happen to anyone? We're all dicks!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Destiny
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Did this happen to anyone else or just me?
Today's...
a year ago
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Did this happen to anyone else or just me?
Today's News:
Look Mary Roach liked it and what else do you need to know?
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Resonsible
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The whole is worse than the sum of its parts...
a year ago
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The whole is worse than the sum of its parts sometimes.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Anxious
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You really gotta drag out the shhhhhhh
Today's...
a year ago
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You really gotta drag out the shhhhhhh
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Wow
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Earlier he changed his name to Emperor but nobody...
9 months ago
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Earlier he changed his name to Emperor but nobody was buying it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Life
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Reading astrobiology ruined the universe for...
4 months ago
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Reading astrobiology ruined the universe for me.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Mittening
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Tiny hats would cost a literal fraction of the...
a year ago
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Tiny hats would cost a literal fraction of the price of the mittens.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Length
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Every time I tell a joke about ads targeting men...
2 months ago
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Every time I tell a joke about ads targeting men for being weak I wonder if I'm the only one who's being targeted.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Hands Down
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Wings would also be acceptable, as would a thousand...
7 months ago
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Wings would also be acceptable, as would a thousand gibbering eyes.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Threshold
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I like to think the robot apocalypse won't feel so...
a year ago
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I like to think the robot apocalypse won't feel so bad if we really do our best to earn it.
Today's News:
PSSST. Hey NYC, it's gonna get pretty dorky.
PHD Comics
07/12/21 PHD comic: 'James Webb Telescope'
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
...
over a year ago
Piled Higher
& Deeper by Jorge
Cham
www.phdcomics.com
title:
"James Webb Telescope" - originally published
7/12/2021
For the latest news in PHD Comics, CLICK HERE!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Augmented
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A later update just turns things you don't want to...
10 months ago
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A later update just turns things you don't want to see into bursts of pixie dust.
Today's News:
The Universe of...
My reply to the people who want to designate my neighborhood a "historic district"
Last week I received a widely circulated email that began:
With tall apartment buildings being...
3 months ago
Last week I received a widely circulated email that began:
With tall apartment buildings being erected all around, we feel it
is ever more important to preserve our community.
I sent this reply.
I have been a Spruce Hill homeowner for 16 years. I had to miss the
June 26...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Heretic
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For A City on Mars, I read a lot of war theory, and...
a year ago
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For A City on Mars, I read a lot of war theory, and one of the interesting things was how almost everyone stressed immediately that most places and times are peaceful.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Practical Eschatology
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I wonder when the first cult run by a robot will...
a year ago
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I wonder when the first cult run by a robot will start up.
Today's News:
The Universe of...
A complex bug with a ⸢simple⸣ fix
Last month I did a fairly complex piece of systems programming that
worked surprisingly well. But...
3 months ago
Last month I did a fairly complex piece of systems programming that
worked surprisingly well. But it had one big bug that took me a day
to track down.
One reason I find the bug interesting is that it exemplifies the sort
of challenges that come up in systems programming. The...
xkcd.com
Time Traveler Causes of Death
4 months ago
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bullying
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You're gonna wish the conditions of your birth were...
a year ago
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You're gonna wish the conditions of your birth were altered so ass to prevent this unpleasant occurrence while leaving your identity largely intact, bro!
Today's News:
OK, so my new favorite compliment to receive is 'I tried to...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pinch
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If he'd been Steve Hitler, there'd be no Steve now....
7 months ago
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If he'd been Steve Hitler, there'd be no Steve now. Deep thoughts.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - The Beauty of Science
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This comic based directly on my gross biologist...
a year ago
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This comic based directly on my gross biologist wife.
Today's News:
WELP, looks like a bunch more bonus strips go up today thanks to buyers of A City on Mars. More soon and thank you all for your preorders!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Best
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Is it time? Is it time for a book of these?
Today's...
10 months ago
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Is it time? Is it time for a book of these?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sad
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We can get sad alllll niiiiight lonnnnng
Today's...
a year ago
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We can get sad alllll niiiiight lonnnnng
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Homemade
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You could also do history by unboxing...
3 months ago
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You could also do history by unboxing artifacts.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Happiness
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We should be measuring happiness of CATS.
Today's...
5 months ago
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We should be measuring happiness of CATS.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bat
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You ever imagine how you'd feel if there were...
6 months ago
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You ever imagine how you'd feel if there were constant fights between anonymous well-armed vigilante factions. Eventually everyone would just move to the suburbs.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - History
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It's true though.
Today's News:
a year ago
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It's true though.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Worse
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My knowledge of Batman ends somewhere around 1952,...
a year ago
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My knowledge of Batman ends somewhere around 1952, when his costume was at its peak.
Today's News:
Hello! If you missed the kickstarter, or just want a joke book about cosmology or a signed copy of A City on Mars, please go here...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Tic
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Let's fight about it.
Today's News:
10 months ago
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Let's fight about it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Shoes
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Fortunately he was able to invest those socks and...
a year ago
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Fortunately he was able to invest those socks and return a dividend later.
Today's News:
Monday!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - License
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You'd think working in the fellatio building would...
5 months ago
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You'd think working in the fellatio building would be exciting, but it's mostly paperwork and meetings.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Digest
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I am not tholin' this colon?
Today's News:
PSSST....
a year ago
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I am not tholin' this colon?
Today's News:
PSSST. Hey London!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Excel
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Eff y'all, excel is a perfectly acceptable...
3 months ago
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Eff y'all, excel is a perfectly acceptable transitive verb. Spread the word.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Future
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I feel there's a lot of money in an app where, when...
a year ago
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I feel there's a lot of money in an app where, when you skip exercise, it projects your future body slightly degrading.
Today's News:
We did it! ACOM is an NYT bestseller. Thanks everyone - this'll help us get a bit more...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Profile
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This is a deepfake. The real comic was way...
10 months ago
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This is a deepfake. The real comic was way funnier.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Moat
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For any problem there's a set of solutions that...
a year ago
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For any problem there's a set of solutions that would actually work but would be too weird to be accepted.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Back
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The eyelashes suddenly appear as part of a rapid...
a month ago
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The eyelashes suddenly appear as part of a rapid transition to being an anime character.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Standup
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Have you noticed this thing where people say AI...
a year ago
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Have you noticed this thing where people say AI will never be as good as Shakespeare, but then nobody mentions that none of us are as good as Shakespeare?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Facts
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He finds inner peace by creating outer...
6 months ago
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He finds inner peace by creating outer noise.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Society
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The good news about our society is everyone comes...
9 months ago
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The good news about our society is everyone comes early.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Never had
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It later turns out that airborne carcinogens slow...
a year ago
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It later turns out that airborne carcinogens slow global warming, so everything is fine.
Today's News:
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