Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Life
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Hovertext:
This is the humiliation fetish planet.
Today's...
4 months ago
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Hovertext:
This is the humiliation fetish planet.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Social
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Hovertext:
The funniest thing is that all the humans are dead...
a year ago
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The funniest thing is that all the humans are dead and all the talking things at the end are confused robots!
Today's News:
We're a best book of the year!
The Universe of...
Stuff I wanted to say to the historic district people but didn't
[ Thanks to John Wiersba for noticing that I forgot to publish this. ]
A few weeks ago I wrote
a...
3 months ago
[ Thanks to John Wiersba for noticing that I forgot to publish this. ]
A few weeks ago I wrote
a letter to my neighbors about why
I thought it was a bad idea to oppose building more housing in our
neighborhood.
I didn't write this paragraph:
In the past it has often happened that...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Summit
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Hovertext:
I will never close that paren. Never. In fact,...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
I will never close that paren. Never. In fact, here's an open one: (
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Probe
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Hovertext:
Well I'm pushing back 10 years the date my kids get...
10 months ago
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Hovertext:
Well I'm pushing back 10 years the date my kids get to read these.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
I made some animated shorts
Watch the very first Oatmeal cartoons.
View on my website
a year ago
Watch the very first Oatmeal cartoons.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Aftermath
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Hovertext:
One of the most reassuring thoughts I've ever had...
2 months ago
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One of the most reassuring thoughts I've ever had is that the day I die, there will be some young person in my family comparing it to the loss of a hamster.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Review
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Hovertext:
You get scared to do 4 stars because then they...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
You get scared to do 4 stars because then they inquire how they can improve service.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Nature
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Hovertext:
In a couple years it'll be time for the pro-robot...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
In a couple years it'll be time for the pro-robot anti-nature SMBC collection.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Kept
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Hovertext:
Sure he's on an unrendered background but the angle...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Sure he's on an unrendered background but the angle on the shoes is perfect.
Today's News:
Stretch goals are being revealed faster than I had expected and I should've planned more!!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Am
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Hovertext:
There is no Steve-in-Itself! There's not even a...
11 months ago
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Hovertext:
There is no Steve-in-Itself! There's not even a thing that believes it is Steve, now help me decide what's for dinner!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Tree
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Hovertext:
Patreon subscribers were pretty quick to suggest a...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Patreon subscribers were pretty quick to suggest a tree that poisons the area around it. Really, I've attracted a beautiful audience here.
Today's News:
Stay tuned for an incoming bonus update thanks to buyers of my new book!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Life
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Hovertext:
Reading astrobiology ruined the universe for...
4 months ago
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Hovertext:
Reading astrobiology ruined the universe for me.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Time
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Hovertext:
Look you're not allowed to make meaningful changes...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Look you're not allowed to make meaningful changes to history so this sort of stuff is the next best thing.
Today's News:
Psssst. Hey, London.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Resonsible
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Hovertext:
The whole is worse than the sum of its parts...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
The whole is worse than the sum of its parts sometimes.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Apply
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Hovertext:
Hope the socks and sandals don't make this NSFW for...
7 months ago
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Hovertext:
Hope the socks and sandals don't make this NSFW for you.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Touch
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Hovertext:
The deepest cut is when he pets his cat, raised...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
The deepest cut is when he pets his cat, raised from kittenhood for 10 years, and nothing happens.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Simulation
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Hovertext:
Or the simulators, insanely, think we'd rather have...
7 months ago
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Hovertext:
Or the simulators, insanely, think we'd rather have a life of striving together.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Instance
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Hovertext:
Later he deletes this simulation of his girlfriend...
2 months ago
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Hovertext:
Later he deletes this simulation of his girlfriend simulating her breaking up with him.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Esteem
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Hovertext:
Sometimes the votey panel is better than the comic...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Sometimes the votey panel is better than the comic and I simply have to accept it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Mechanism
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Hovertext:
People who say microeconomics isn't useful in real...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
People who say microeconomics isn't useful in real life are simply not being creative enough.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Age
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Hovertext:
Honestly whenever I hear someone has been murdered...
2 weeks ago
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Hovertext:
Honestly whenever I hear someone has been murdered I just assume it was one of them. How would you know?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Clippy
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Hovertext:
Have you noticed nobody has ever explained *why*...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Have you noticed nobody has ever explained *why* it's supposedly bad if human beings are converted to paperclips?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Mittening
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Hovertext:
Tiny hats would cost a literal fraction of the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Tiny hats would cost a literal fraction of the price of the mittens.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Equation
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Hovertext:
The real fantasy is clearly a VR suit with a food...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
The real fantasy is clearly a VR suit with a food tube and a lack of perception that you're in the VR suit with a food tube.
Today's News:
ICYMI, BAHFest London is back. 35% of tickets are already gone a month out and we haven't...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Paradox
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Hovertext:
Whenever I explain this to someone the only...
4 months ago
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Hovertext:
Whenever I explain this to someone the only responses are amazement and being unable to fathom why anyone would care.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Look
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Hovertext:
Spiderina Ravendark and I are in LOVE
Today's...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Spiderina Ravendark and I are in LOVE
Today's News:
Last chance!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Joking
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Hovertext:
I wonder if any supervillains read Nudge?
Today's...
3 months ago
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Hovertext:
I wonder if any supervillains read Nudge?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Fantasy
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Hovertext:
No, Orifices in the Void cannot be your new...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
No, Orifices in the Void cannot be your new band-name.
Today's News:
If you wanted to get A City on Mars but the prices was a little high, WELL Barnes and Noble is doing a 3 day 25% discount on preorders.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - God
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Hovertext:
Someday, long after the robots have won, they will...
3 weeks ago
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Hovertext:
Someday, long after the robots have won, they will find this comic and not laugh because that is not a thing they do.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Human Arts
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Hovertext:
Bam, another apocalypse thwarted by...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Bam, another apocalypse thwarted by Weinersmith.
Today's News:
I promised I'd do more longform once the latest book manuscript was done and HERE WE ARE.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Look
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Hovertext:
There was a discussion on patreon about whether pix...
5 months ago
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Hovertext:
There was a discussion on patreon about whether pix or pics is appropriate and I stand by my choice.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - A City on Mars
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Hovertext:
I will be nagging about this book for the next...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
I will be nagging about this book for the next while, and I apologize for that. Good news though - the main form of nag will be bonus SMBC comics. Also, HOLY SHIT GUYS, ANDY FUCKIN WEIR!
Today's News:
Good morning, friends. Today...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Law
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Hovertext:
This is a complete theory of law, no exceptions,...
9 months ago
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Hovertext:
This is a complete theory of law, no exceptions, don't email me.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Jenny
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Hovertext:
You can of course remove the last name, but then...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
You can of course remove the last name, but then you're causing less damage to a larger group. Figuring out how to maximize damage is left as an exercise for the reader.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - What the
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Hovertext:
Don't blame us - you're the one watching.
Today's...
7 months ago
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Hovertext:
Don't blame us - you're the one watching.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pain
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Hovertext:
That one guy is actually a robot designed to look...
8 months ago
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Hovertext:
That one guy is actually a robot designed to look like a human, so it's cool.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sciences
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Hovertext:
The arts of course existed before Aristotle was...
3 months ago
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Hovertext:
The arts of course existed before Aristotle was wrong about them.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Potable
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Hovertext:
If repetition over time has led to the veneration...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
If repetition over time has led to the veneration of a particular alcoholic beverage in a sacred context TAKE A DRIIIIIIIINK
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Boof
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Hovertext:
The frustrating thing is when she's trying to get...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
The frustrating thing is when she's trying to get her crack but it's at the bottom of the purse under the boxes of tissues, pocket bible, and coupon books.
Today's News:
Sorry for the missed updates, but I am at last home! For...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pinch
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Hovertext:
If he'd been Steve Hitler, there'd be no Steve now....
7 months ago
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Hovertext:
If he'd been Steve Hitler, there'd be no Steve now. Deep thoughts.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Rammed
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Hovertext:
Bam, alignment solved. Earth should join my patreon...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Bam, alignment solved. Earth should join my patreon as a thankyou.
Today's News:
Just 8 more days!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sorry
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Hovertext:
This is like a time machine to SMBC circa...
a month ago
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Hovertext:
This is like a time machine to SMBC circa 2005.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - LLM
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Hovertext:
Best you can do with cosmos-3.5 is get a universe...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Best you can do with cosmos-3.5 is get a universe that's classical at low speeds.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Content
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Hovertext:
It's time to open the SMBC foodgore channel. Who's...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
It's time to open the SMBC foodgore channel. Who's in?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Constant
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Hovertext:
It would've been so easy to set up The Matrix so...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
It would've been so easy to set up The Matrix so that nobody would leave.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
Rise from the deep
A comic about Twitter.
View on my website
over a year ago
A comic about Twitter.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Michel
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Hovertext:
For reasons related to current research projects,...
9 months ago
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Hovertext:
For reasons related to current research projects, SMBC will be slowly switching over to obscure literary references for the foreseeable future. It's been nice knowing you.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Back away
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Hovertext:
The hard part is keeping your nostrils motionless...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
The hard part is keeping your nostrils motionless until you hear the footsteps fade away.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
I'm thinking of a word. Try to guess what it is.
I coded a daily word-guessing game.
View on my website
a year ago
I coded a daily word-guessing game.
View on my website
The Universe of...
Loki the comedian
Toph and I were discussing the story of Loki and Skaði, one of my
favorites. (Previously.) The...
3 months ago
Toph and I were discussing the story of Loki and Skaði, one of my
favorites. (Previously.) The Æsir
have killed Skaði's father, and owe her compensation. She has been
sad since her father died, she says, and demands that the Æsir make
her laugh. Loki rubs his hands together...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Life
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Hovertext:
Six dimensions is OK, but 7+ is for freaks.
Today's...
4 months ago
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Hovertext:
Six dimensions is OK, but 7+ is for freaks.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pig
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Hovertext:
I feel there's a culinary horseshoe graph where...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
I feel there's a culinary horseshoe graph where only the highest and lowest quality restaurants will serve you macerated chicken kidneys or whatever.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Simulation
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Hovertext:
Go ahead. Remember that moment.
Today's...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Go ahead. Remember that moment.
Today's News:
Remember 20 years ago I started a comic about butts and stuff and now I got a book listed alongside Kip Thorne's? Truly, we're in a weird branch of the multiverse.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Temp
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Hovertext:
Hey, at least Kelvins would've been worse?
Today's...
11 months ago
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Hovertext:
Hey, at least Kelvins would've been worse?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Down
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Hovertext:
Patreon supporter Mudag points out this is the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Patreon supporter Mudag points out this is the SECOND comic on this theme. A little math suggests I'll have a full collection some time in the 2040s.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Brand
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Hovertext:
This is why smbc refuses to be about anything...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
This is why smbc refuses to be about anything whatsoever, except maybe the idea that clowns are a species with interesting sexual customs.
Today's News:
Geeks of the UK! If you pre-order soon, you get a 20% discount on my new...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Evolution
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Hovertext:
The worst part is knowing that your great...
a month ago
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Hovertext:
The worst part is knowing that your great grandchildren will find the mutation sexy.
Today's News:
Last Place Comics
Boy’s Club VS Girl’s Club, Part 1
The post Boy’s Club VS Girl’s Club, Part 1 appeared first on Last Place Comics.
3 weeks ago
The post Boy’s Club VS Girl’s Club, Part 1 appeared first on Last Place Comics.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Hatero
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Hovertext:
It's the baaaaasexuals you have to look out...
10 months ago
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Hovertext:
It's the baaaaasexuals you have to look out for.
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
Taking selfies from various angles
No one out-pizzas the Keith
View on my website
over a year ago
No one out-pizzas the Keith
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Temple
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Hovertext:
Let us rise and make similar noises!
Today's News:
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Let us rise and make similar noises!
Today's News:
The Oatmeal - Comics...
It's been fifteen years.
I created The Oatmeal fifteen years ago.
View on my website
8 months ago
I created The Oatmeal fifteen years ago.
View on my website
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Specter
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Hovertext:
Sometimes they just read our declarations of war...
6 months ago
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Hovertext:
Sometimes they just read our declarations of war and get giggle-fits.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Cult
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Hovertext:
Just because Scandinavians do it doesn't mean it's...
11 months ago
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Hovertext:
Just because Scandinavians do it doesn't mean it's the right thing to do.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Real
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Hovertext:
Godel proved you can't prove anything. Don't think...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Godel proved you can't prove anything. Don't think about it too hard.
Today's News:
Happy New Year,
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Why
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Hovertext:
No, this is not my best comic, this is THE best...
9 months ago
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Hovertext:
No, this is not my best comic, this is THE best comic.
Today's News:
Thanks geeks of Austin for coming to see me!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Secrets
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Hovertext:
Kids, you can literally find ways to annihilate all...
10 months ago
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Hovertext:
Kids, you can literally find ways to annihilate all humans, but you have to start with algebra!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Consciousness
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Hovertext:
Some time in the next 10 years, someone's gonna...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Some time in the next 10 years, someone's gonna whoopsie an AGI into existence trying to create a highly multimodal porn-bot.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Augmented
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Hovertext:
Beer goggles were also cheaper.
Today's News:
10 months ago
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Hovertext:
Beer goggles were also cheaper.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Gilgamesh
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Hovertext:
No really, read it. This is her number one...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
No really, read it. This is her number one move.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Conscience
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Hovertext:
I wonder if anyone's dropped a 20 at an economics...
5 months ago
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Hovertext:
I wonder if anyone's dropped a 20 at an economics conference to see if nobody touches it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Theory
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Hovertext:
This is one of those frustrating comics where the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
This is one of those frustrating comics where the votey, made in 4 seconds, is funnier than the whole comic.
Today's News:
Bea Wolf is available now!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Research
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Hovertext:
I have this fear that one day an all-powerful AI...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
I have this fear that one day an all-powerful AI will be able to examine a statement you made and determine precisely where you got the information and it will be the most shame-filled moment of your life.
Today's News:
Very sweet...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Snake
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Hovertext:
A patreon subscriber points out that there aren't...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
A patreon subscriber points out that there aren't any South American pythons, but my defense is that the drawings don't even look like pythons.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Taste
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Hovertext:
Really, without the heart medication and...
4 months ago
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Hovertext:
Really, without the heart medication and microplastics you don't get the proper terroire.
Today's News:
The Universe of...
XKCD game theory question
(Source: XKCD “Exam numbers”.)
This post is about the bottom center panel, “Game Theory final...
3 months ago
(Source: XKCD “Exam numbers”.)
This post is about the bottom center panel, “Game Theory final exam”.
I don't know much about game theory and I haven't seen any other
discussion of this question. But I have a strategy I think is
plausible and I'm somewhat pleased with.
(I assume...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Joke
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Hovertext:
You can use an LLM to infinitely extend the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
You can use an LLM to infinitely extend the description in panel 2.
Today's News:
See you tonight, NYC!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Feelings
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Hovertext:
Also, self-destructiveness stops being attractive...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Also, self-destructiveness stops being attractive some time around age 22, but for some reason people keep doing it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Confession
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Hovertext:
She'd actually be into it if he didn't always wear...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
She'd actually be into it if he didn't always wear those yellow crocs.
Today's News:
Monday
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Relatable
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Hovertext:
This comic will become way MORE relatable after the...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
This comic will become way MORE relatable after the apocalypse when everyone urgently needs potatos. It's what you call playing the long game.
Today's News:
A second starred review for A City on Mars - this one from Publisher's...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Remember
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Hovertext:
Do you want to do EVERYTHING right or do you want...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
Do you want to do EVERYTHING right or do you want to have FRIENDSHIP?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - PIE
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Hovertext:
If anyone does this, please pour out a glass of...
a year ago
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Hovertext:
If anyone does this, please pour out a glass of eggnog antecedent beverage for me.
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It's the only Indiana jones that actually takes...
a year ago
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It's the only Indiana jones that actually takes place in Indiana.
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The really creepy part is the tower is its...
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The really creepy part is the tower is its cloaca.
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Some people bulk up by eating 12 small bird-cells,...
3 months ago
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Some people bulk up by eating 12 small bird-cells, but they are weak.
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Wishing Derek Parfit were still around to roll his...
2 months ago
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Wishing Derek Parfit were still around to roll his eyes at this.
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Freedom!
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a year ago
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Freedom!
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This is the most detailed background I've ever...
a year ago
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This is the most detailed background I've ever drawn.
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God he is just absolutely destroying the spine of...
a year ago
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God he is just absolutely destroying the spine of that book.
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I am signing at Telegraph in Charlottesville: Today at 2! If you want a signed copy, this is my only remaining scheduled signing right now so please come...
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Constructing the 30,000-tone language for Anne was...
4 weeks ago
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Constructing the 30,000-tone language for Anne was more challenging.
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If heroes would just check the betting markets...
a year ago
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If heroes would just check the betting markets before fighting they could make much better choices.
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Really you should wake up every morning and check...
a year ago
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Really you should wake up every morning and check the integral of happiness over time.
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I originally had a hamster but that seemed...
a year ago
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I originally had a hamster but that seemed mean.
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Really you ought to text before you initiate a...
a year ago
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Really you ought to text before you initiate a knock-knock joke.
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Now eat your goals of green thing!
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a year ago
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Now eat your goals of green thing!
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Meet Algo, the Boss-Guilt Absolver
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a year ago
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Meet Algo, the Boss-Guilt Absolver
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Feel free to continue destroying my hand buy buying additional copes:
https://www.smbc-comics.com/bea
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Dangle-balls is copyright SMBC Industries, All...
8 months ago
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Dangle-balls is copyright SMBC Industries, All Rights Reserved
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Bet if you get close to those peppermints they're...
11 months ago
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Bet if you get close to those peppermints they're covered with dead flies.
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Later, things take a Heinleinian twist for the...
a year ago
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Later, things take a Heinleinian twist for the horrible.
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The Oatmeal - Comics...
Therapy is now horrible
Intrusive thoughts and more.
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5 months ago
Intrusive thoughts and more.
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You're gonna wish the conditions of your birth were...
a year ago
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You're gonna wish the conditions of your birth were altered so ass to prevent this unpleasant occurrence while leaving your identity largely intact, bro!
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OK, so my new favorite compliment to receive is 'I tried to...
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He did a similar thing with dinosaurs but it got...
a year ago
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He did a similar thing with dinosaurs but it got way out of hand.
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BAHFest! London! Saturday! With the Ig Nobels! Nerdiest night of the year, I promise. Tickets already 2/3 gone, so buy soon!
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Thank you everyone! I would love to keep bringing...
a year ago
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Thank you everyone! I would love to keep bringing more of these, and your support makes that happen :)
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The Oatmeal - Comics...
Good vs Evil
I have an update about my Netflix show.
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a year ago
I have an update about my Netflix show.
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Sometimes I look out the window and think of how...
a month ago
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Sometimes I look out the window and think of how many babies are now part of a personal brand.
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This is the real afterlife.
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5 months ago
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This is the real afterlife.
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English would be so much funnier, for generations,...
a year ago
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English would be so much funnier, for generations, if we made a one-time switch from men to mans.
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Someday I'm gonna have a book in which the comic...
a year ago
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Someday I'm gonna have a book in which the comic sounds like it's going to become controversial and then goes all in on stupid.
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Final week!
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I'm just saying, Disney, I am married to a...
a year ago
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I'm just saying, Disney, I am married to a parasitologist and the tick people really want accuracy in the new movie. Call me.
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You'd think working in the fellatio building would...
5 months ago
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You'd think working in the fellatio building would be exciting, but it's mostly paperwork and meetings.
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I'll have a comic update in a minute but I thought...
a year ago
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I'll have a comic update in a minute but I thought you might enjoy this paper I was involved with. Click to read - it's available online for free.
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Or click here to see.
The paper was based on a culled chapter from A...
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Hoping the Welsh isn't lol.
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3 months ago
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Hoping the Welsh isn't lol.
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Some of the comics are written just so Corey Mohler...
a year ago
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Some of the comics are written just so Corey Mohler will look at his screen, shake his head, and sigh.
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Also, in this model, everything is flat and it's...
a year ago
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Also, in this model, everything is flat and it's the same everywhere and eventually all the stars are dead!
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Who is kind - he that kicketh a man in the balls...
9 months ago
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Who is kind - he that kicketh a man in the balls for no reason, or he that doeth not?
Today's News:
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Also I'm pretty sure 'et cetera' means 'I'm out of...
a year ago
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Also I'm pretty sure 'et cetera' means 'I'm out of examples but there are probably more.'
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I'm just saying, it wouldn't be the MOST useless...
a year ago
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I'm just saying, it wouldn't be the MOST useless expenditure of grant money.
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Where it gets really weird is when people start...
a year ago
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Where it gets really weird is when people start saying they're pretty sure they know how all of history works.
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Cool article we contributed to for NYT.
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I got this idea from a story I can't remember, only...
a year ago
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I got this idea from a story I can't remember, only that it had the line 'I will show you the power of illusion' and was, possibly, from the Hindu tradition. Anyone know it?
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Inside though, the human is thinking how it still...
7 months ago
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Inside though, the human is thinking how it still beats a real job.
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You can send me hatemail, but you have to get...
11 months ago
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You can send me hatemail, but you have to get organized first.
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To be included in the forthcoming Psychologically...
2 months ago
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To be included in the forthcoming Psychologically Abusive Halloween collection.
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Weirdly, evil Kant requires you to lie to save...
a year ago
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Weirdly, evil Kant requires you to lie to save people from murderers.
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Oh right, you're experiencing it from a state of...
6 months ago
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Oh right, you're experiencing it from a state of total oneness wherein time is without meaning, my bad.
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Also what if this IS the experience machine and the...
a month ago
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Also what if this IS the experience machine and the real world is way worse?
Today's News:
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Please, oh god please use panel 5 wherever you...
a year ago
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Please, oh god please use panel 5 wherever you can.
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Meanwhile, Steve can't even see who he's having sex...
a year ago
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Meanwhile, Steve can't even see who he's having sex with.
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I would find it really satisfying if you could turn...
a year ago
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I would find it really satisfying if you could turn a knob in the universe and diffraction fringes would go away.
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Whew! Finally back on my update schedule. ICYMI a couple nice reviews have come in for the new book,...
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Ever since twitter got weird people have tried to...
a year ago
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Ever since twitter got weird people have tried to fix twitter by making twitter.
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If you used 52 it'd be obvious what the point...
a year ago
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If you used 52 it'd be obvious what the point was.
Today's News:
Click back for today's bonus update. Also buy my book!
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When you add in the Stalin potential it gets really...
8 months ago
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When you add in the Stalin potential it gets really dicey.
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I'm actually surprised no weird economist is...
a year ago
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I'm actually surprised no weird economist is pushing this somewhere.
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Later she's forced against her will to take care of...
10 months ago
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Later she's forced against her will to take care of her physical and mental wellbeing.
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Number 3 move is the combination, because each...
a month ago
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Number 3 move is the combination, because each takes away from the other.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Outside
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This works great on children too.
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4 months ago
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This works great on children too.
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Absolute Midden is copyright SMBC Enterprises 2024...
8 months ago
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Absolute Midden is copyright SMBC Enterprises 2024 all rights reserved.
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Any swear words you notice are pareidolia.
Today's...
a month ago
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Any swear words you notice are pareidolia.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ontological
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That than which is a perfectly acceptable English...
a year ago
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That than which is a perfectly acceptable English language construction, deal with it.
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Patreon subscriber Ivan points out that effectively...
3 months ago
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Patreon subscriber Ivan points out that effectively his whole life became a football pull. I wonder if Lucy is watching from a distance.
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Interestingly they're both reading AI image...
a year ago
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Interestingly they're both reading AI image generation subreddits and pretending it's not to see the pinups.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Reflect
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On the other hand, when Jesus wanted to do a...
7 months ago
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On the other hand, when Jesus wanted to do a breakup he just became dead for a few days.
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Come on Depths of Wikipedia, where's your...
7 months ago
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Come on Depths of Wikipedia, where's your topological Pair of Pants post?
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Flesh
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I don't need your life story, I need to know how...
11 months ago
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I don't need your life story, I need to know how much lemon to put in this man-tartare!
Today's News:
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All of these are of course just subsets of the sole...
3 weeks ago
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All of these are of course just subsets of the sole story category, which is Ape Struggled And Was Thereby Changed.
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This is literally the funniest clusivity joke ever...
a year ago
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This is literally the funniest clusivity joke ever created.
Today's News:
Another double update thanks to this stupid book I wrote that people keep preordering.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Attention
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The real endgame is when AI can just generate novel...
a year ago
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The real endgame is when AI can just generate novel cat videos inside your brain.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Up
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I wonder how many miracles get boring if you just...
8 months ago
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I wonder how many miracles get boring if you just grant god an extra dimension?
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Guard
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Really if you can use the automation to increase...
5 months ago
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Really if you can use the automation to increase productivity, you can just afford better city defenses.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Burial
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They must've felt so in tune with their...
a year ago
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They must've felt so in tune with their environment.
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Next Tuesday!
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pino
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I am prepared for your call Hollywood. It's...
2 months ago
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I am prepared for your call Hollywood. It's time.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Poetry
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Anyone who thinks AI endangers poets should first...
a month ago
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Anyone who thinks AI endangers poets should first prove that there exists a poetry journal with more readers than contributors.
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This will be written one day when a traveler comes...
a year ago
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This will be written one day when a traveler comes upon the ruins of Ohio.
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Thanks, everyone. It took about 5 years to get from...
a year ago
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Thanks, everyone. It took about 5 years to get from the beginning to here. It's as a good of a thing as I can write, and I hope you enjoy it.
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The most frequently asked question is the age range for Bea Wolf readers,...
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Written after enjoying the delightfully...
a year ago
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Written after enjoying the delightfully controversial book Status and Culture.
Today's News:
xkcd.com
Definitely
definitively' autocorrect rule to their keyboard." alt="A really mean prank you can play on someone...
a year ago
definitively' autocorrect rule to their keyboard." alt="A really mean prank you can play on someone who's picky about words is to add a 'definitely->definitively' autocorrect rule to their keyboard." />
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Cult
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a year ago
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https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/weiner/the-universe-abridged-beyond-the-point-of-usefulness?ref=6vghse
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Thank you!
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Myth
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Sometimes I save a rant for 10 years and finally...
7 months ago
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Sometimes I save a rant for 10 years and finally decide it's not a thinkpiece, it's a stupid joke.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sit Down
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I do check to see what became of the PLiF guys...
8 months ago
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I do check to see what became of the PLiF guys every six months or so.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Half
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Hoping to be able to rematerialize your loved ones...
3 months ago
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Hoping to be able to rematerialize your loved ones after the next funding round.
Today's News:
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Curse
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Really she should awaken after three dates have...
4 months ago
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Really she should awaken after three dates have gone very well.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Micro
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On the plus side we can harvest them so future...
3 months ago
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On the plus side we can harvest them so future Martians can have microbeads in their soap.
Today's News:
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pseudoscience
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Take that, 100 year old method largely no longer in...
a year ago
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Take that, 100 year old method largely no longer in use!
Today's News:
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Tradition
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Tradition is whatever had just faded when I was...
3 weeks ago
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Tradition is whatever had just faded when I was 12.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Productivity
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I wonder if this is the source of the protestant...
a year ago
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I wonder if this is the source of the protestant work ethic?
Today's News:
narf
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Engish is easy. No conjugation - you just have to...
a year ago
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Engish is easy. No conjugation - you just have to memorize 50,000 words and you're good.
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - A Family Dispute
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Okay, occasionally they are...
9 months ago
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Okay, occasionally they are autobiographical.
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Don't at me, history of international politics...
a month ago
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Don't at me, history of international politics scholars!
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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Slosh
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Weirdly, bing ai won't generate this story for me,...
a year ago
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Weirdly, bing ai won't generate this story for me, so we may be OK.
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CommitStrip
A touch of real life, but not too much
over a year ago
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Game
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Some of the kids in my family once invented a...
a year ago
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Some of the kids in my family once invented a version where you had to get one of each color in order to get through the final step, mathematically guaranteeing the game could never end. The didn't mind at all. I feel like there's...
The Oatmeal - Comics...
Infinity (noun)
A comic about video calls and desperation.
View on my website
over a year ago
A comic about video calls and desperation.
View on my website
xkcd.com
Time Traveler Causes of Death
4 months ago
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Your Bit
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An interesting future question is whether...
a year ago
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An interesting future question is whether artificial wombs will displace stork-work or lead to increased prosperity.
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The Oatmeal - Comics...
Baby VS Intimacy
A comic about intimate moments.
View on my website
over a year ago
A comic about intimate moments.
View on my website
Abstruse Goose
the glorious new master race
over a year ago
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Up
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Really feel like I'm getting back to my roots...
6 months ago
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Really feel like I'm getting back to my roots taking pot shots at creationists.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Etymology
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This will be in the compendium of SMBC etymology...
6 days ago
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This will be in the compendium of SMBC etymology jokes, volume 8.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sleep
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Thanks to many readers for telling me the story I...
a year ago
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Thanks to many readers for telling me the story I was thinking for yesterday's comic, which was a myth about Narada and Krishna. Still can't remember where I heard it first, but thanks!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Laws
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I feel like every ethical system works better if...
10 months ago
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I feel like every ethical system works better if you just have people ask themselves 'is this a bit much?' once in a while.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Gold
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When I think of altruism, I think of guys selling...
a year ago
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When I think of altruism, I think of guys selling apocalypse gold on youtube.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Garfield
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I heard the Internet likes comics about...
a year ago
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I heard the Internet likes comics about cats?
Today's News:
Big thing coming MONDAY!
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Geometry
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This joke conceived while reading Tarski's...
a year ago
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This joke conceived while reading Tarski's biography, a fact which will cause four of you to laugh politely.
Today's News:
Hey guys, ask us anything because WE TOOK OVER THE BARNES & NOBLE INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Was
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I wasn't gonna do this, but enough weirdos on...
a year ago
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I wasn't gonna do this, but enough weirdos on mastodon liked it that here we are.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Hook
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It makes sense if you hear it but don't think about...
3 months ago
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It makes sense if you hear it but don't think about it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Fun
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All I'm saying is according to quantum mechanics...
4 months ago
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All I'm saying is according to quantum mechanics there's SOME chance a duck explodes because you thought about it.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Stress
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Froth is evidence that you're still breathing! It's...
a year ago
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Froth is evidence that you're still breathing! It's a sign of health!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Empirical
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Usually you can't trace your line of thought on a...
a year ago
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Usually you can't trace your line of thought on a joke, but this is one is firmly at the intersection of listening to a sentimental podcast during the same period in which I was reading a few Karl Popper books.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Teach
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Later they just have their bots engage in a debate...
a year ago
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Later they just have their bots engage in a debate while they go get ice cream.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Paradigm
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There's no turning back. We live in the same world...
a year ago
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There's no turning back. We live in the same world as this joke now, and always will.
Today's News:
Hey friends, social media makes it impossible to reach my own readers. But you, the RSS reader have the ability to check out my...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Duh
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Based on educating my 10 year old on the varieties...
a month ago
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Based on educating my 10 year old on the varieties of duhs.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ethics
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Everyone is a utilitarian until being a utilitarian...
3 weeks ago
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Everyone is a utilitarian until being a utilitarian is low utility.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - New Years
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Just because a few people on Patreon asked - this...
a year ago
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Just because a few people on Patreon asked - this is the end of this individual comic. SMBC will persist long enough to be taken over by the AI who killed us all.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Underwear
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Later this turns out to be foreplay.
Today's News:
9 months ago
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Later this turns out to be foreplay.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Conscious
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Panel 2 is the title of my autobiography.
Today's...
a year ago
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Panel 2 is the title of my autobiography.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Existence
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Does Santa exist? No, I have killed him.
Today's...
12 months ago
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Does Santa exist? No, I have killed him.
Today's News:
Hey, wanna see me talking space settlements with the Planetary Society?
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ritual
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I'm not saying you should do this, only that it'd...
2 weeks ago
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I'm not saying you should do this, only that it'd be awesome.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Social Media
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I'm just saying, when the robots take over, if...
a year ago
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I'm just saying, when the robots take over, if you're an SMBC reader I think you'll get a little leeway.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Boop
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Have you noticed you can get humans to do almost...
a year ago
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Have you noticed you can get humans to do almost anything as long as it's presented as a scam?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Bigger
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A patreon subscriber asked why the speech bubbles...
5 months ago
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A patreon subscriber asked why the speech bubbles don't slowly become crabs and I'm kicking myself no.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Worse
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My knowledge of Batman ends somewhere around 1952,...
a year ago
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My knowledge of Batman ends somewhere around 1952, when his costume was at its peak.
Today's News:
Hello! If you missed the kickstarter, or just want a joke book about cosmology or a signed copy of A City on Mars, please go here...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - AGI
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Wait, is fire even possible? Doesn't that violate...
a year ago
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Wait, is fire even possible? Doesn't that violate conservation of fire?
Today's News:
Another ruinously flattering review.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Wolf
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Fortunately they didn't have quantitative finance...
11 months ago
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Fortunately they didn't have quantitative finance yet, so he was just a serial killer.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - AI
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Is this the most or least pessimistic comic...
7 months ago
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Is this the most or least pessimistic comic yet?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Learn
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Sitting in detention for having done nothing wrong...
8 months ago
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Sitting in detention for having done nothing wrong is, however, excellent training for service sector work.
Today's News:
Lovely review for Bea Wolf.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Costume
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Patreon users felt this one was too sad, but look...
a year ago
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Patreon users felt this one was too sad, but look at the cute kid in the dino suit!
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Sympathy
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This'll be even funnier once SMBC is infinite...
8 months ago
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This'll be even funnier once SMBC is infinite scroll.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Afterlife
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Why does St. Peter have to stand at that podium all...
a year ago
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Why does St. Peter have to stand at that podium all day? Is he in Hell?
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Robot John Searle
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I am posting this from a train and can't make...
a year ago
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I am posting this from a train and can't make edits, so you'lll just have to dealll with the extra L.
Today's News:
Jazzed to have been read and found convincing by Tyler Cowen.
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Help
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Actually maybe this is why prayer works in old...
10 months ago
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Actually maybe this is why prayer works in old books written when there was a smaller population.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Pop
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The problem is the ghost doesn't want to answer...
a year ago
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The problem is the ghost doesn't want to answer those emails either.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Happiness
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We should be measuring happiness of CATS.
Today's...
5 months ago
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We should be measuring happiness of CATS.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Cortex
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This is why artists and mathematicians were ahead...
6 months ago
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This is why artists and mathematicians were ahead of the curve on madness. You are all us now.
Today's News:
The Universe of...
Look at what they tried to take from us
When I was a kid, the Beatles’ seminal 1966 album Revolver was 20%
shorter. The original release...
3 months ago
When I was a kid, the Beatles’ seminal 1966 album Revolver was 20%
shorter. The original release was not a long album: 14 tracks,
totaling 34:45. But the version I grew up with had 11 tracks,
totaling only 27:31.
Three tracks, all by Lennon, were omitted by Capitol
from the...
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Language
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That's where he pushes the robot into the...
2 months ago
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That's where he pushes the robot into the sea.
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Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Only one
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After about 3 slayings they just sit in a chair,...
a year ago
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After about 3 slayings they just sit in a chair, look out the window, and shake their heads from time to time.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Haiku
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It's at its best when it interrupts a speech every...
3 months ago
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It's at its best when it interrupts a speech every twelve syllables.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Ethics
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Quick thankyou to patreon subscriber/friend Dave...
7 months ago
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Quick thankyou to patreon subscriber/friend Dave Luebke for making this joke more legible.
Today's News:
Saturday Morning...
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal - Repugnant
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There's a newish Parfit biography out Edmonds that...
7 months ago
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There's a newish Parfit biography out Edmonds that is excellent.
Today's News:
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