More from ben-mini
I just finished listening to Lenny’s conversation with Nan Yu, Head of Product at Linear, about what it takes to build a great SaaS product. Like many SaaS apps, the Kibu team and I have taken inspiration from Linear. But as we plan our roadmap and implement new solutions, I ask myself: What’s preventing us from building a product as beautiful as Linear, Slack, or Figma? Sure, time and resources matter, but I sense deeper things at play. Lenny and Nan’s conversation shed light on Linear’s approach and helped me articulate some thoughts: No Dogfooding Nan said that ideas for SaaS apps often start as useful products inside of larger companies. A typical story: a developer solves a personal problem, shares it with her coworkers, gets tons of praise, and considers if other companies have the same problem. I recall the story of Slack going a lot like this, and I suspect Linear is similar. The advantage of this approach is that the founder is customer zero. By building for yourself, user empathy has an instantaneous feedback loop, allowing you to rapidly build based off “vibe” alone. This is obvious advice, as the “built by X, for X” has been a marketing cliché for decades. It explains why the most lauded products in app design are almost always built by a team who can dogfood their own product. Kibu cannot dogfood its own product. As a content provider and documentation platform built for disability providers, Kibu operates with no day-to-day usage of its own product, as one may see at Linear, Slack, or Figma. Without dogfooding, “vibe development” is overshadowed by the voice of the customer. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with customer feedback, but Kibu’s lack of dogfooding handicaps our ability to have that “spidey-sense” of our customers’ needs. This could lead us down a complicated or unscalable path. I am particularly concerned with the latter, as our stellar dev team always ensures the UX passes user acceptability. I wonder how Kibu can mitigate our inability to dogfood: Try to dogfood: We once tried dogfooding by documenting our company goals and providing weekly updates in Kibu (similar to how our customers provide daily updates to their special needs members’ life plan goals). This was a positive step but still a square peg in a round hole. We simply do not operate with the same speed, setting, vocabulary, or consequences as our customers. Hire industry folks: Wow, wouldn’t it be nice to hire a former caretaker that turned into a valuable SaaS contributor! We’re starting to find those on the business side, but we haven’t found an engineer that fits that description. Regardless, by joining Kibu, the employee would have left the industry and no longer be engaging in Kibu. I assume that Strava developers still jog after getting hired lol… Ignore the issue and build: This has been our status quo and likely will be for a while. Let’s double down on customer feedback by scheduling recurring meetings with diverse users. Maybe we even pay them! Is there a company that we can take inspiration from that’s been in our position? What’s the most beautiful app that can’t be dogfooded? My first thought is Shopify, as I’m guessing Tobi Lütke and the whole team don’t personally maintain an e-commerce snowboard shop. Let me know if you can think of other companies. Saying No to “The Man” On the topic of preventing bloat, Nan said Linear is hyper-focused on delivering an exceptional IC experience and is willing to turn down feature requests that don’t align with that vision. For example, if Nan got a request from a middle manager to make end-of-month reporting slightly easier, Linear will deny that request if it means the IC’s work is strained a bit. This “bottom-up” prioritization philosophy is downright enviable! Kibu is in the business of compliance, meaning that we are limited to the needs of our customers’ regulators. If a government agency or grant provider want our customer to complete a 3-page questionnaire for every member every day, then our customer has no choice but to pass that requirement down to us. Our ability to design a frictionless experience for ICs hits a ceiling when met with regulation, no matter how dumb. This hindrance is particularly frustrating because we recognize the economic value that an exceptional IC UX could bring to our customers. If a low-level caretaker can take notes and track attendance on a tool that won’t make them want to blow their brains out, then: The data will be better, incurring less failed audits and penalties. The data will be better, allowing management to better identify inefficiencies that lead to better resource allocation. The staff will spend less time record-keeping and more time caring, leading to better outcomes and success stories. At the same time, regulation is why Kibu Documentation exists in the first place, so if we’re sticking to a Linear-like “bottom-up” product strategy, then it is our duty to make compliance painless, if not a little fun. Reports Come Second: While the economic buyer and regulators relentlessly emphasize the importance of reports, Kibu must remember that reporting is merely a representation of rows and columns. What truly matters is the data inside—which aligns with our philosophy of prioritizing the IC’s data input experience. Kibu has already done a great job delegating customers’ reporting needs to the Customer Success team (hey, that’s me!) with custom Looker reports. Customers stay happy with white-glove reporting, while our product team remains focused on ICs. No BS copy: On the front page of every customer’s Documentation homepage, we have large text that reads “Your org is X% compliant. Found out why” If the goal is compliance, then let’s not blur anything. I’d rather sacrifice a little extra text on the page if it means our nontechnical users know exactly where to go and why. We should take this one step further and extend it to each entity in Kibu, like the member: “Here’s what you need to do to be fully compliant with Athena…“ More unicorns: Whenever you complete a task in Asana, a unicorn flies across your page! So cool. Per my bullet points above, a fun Kibu experience will lead to better financial outcomes for our customers. Tiny Thoughts Okay, the two sections above were the most provocative. Here are some more takeaways that Kibu is already doing. If we’re not, I don’t think it would be too controversial to implement: Y-combinatify Kibu: Our marketing page should be fast, fun, minimal, with lots of polished-up screenshots of our product (like Superhuman or Mintlify). Our brand should be “the new kids on the block” or “finally… Silicon Valley’s best are solving my disability provider problems” Say No to Enterprise: Linear demonstrates great restraint in saying no to Enterprise-level requests that they believe will lead to poor long-term growth. My last company experienced this, and I’m wary of going through it again. The 11-star Experience: The Linear team occasionally plays in a world where resources are unlimited and they can design the best gosh-darn experience. They’re always surprised by how many ideas are viable! Kibu should do the same… I love one developer’s idea of “Call Kibu”, where an IC can simply call a phone number and log their notes for the day- having a back-and-forth conversation with a robot who knows all compliance requirements.
Quick Update: I updated my domain to ben-mini.com! All old URLs and the RSS feed under ben-mini.github.io will automatically redirect, so no changes are needed on your end. By far, the most useful LLM app I’ve made is the Kibu Schema God: I try not to make my posts too technical, but I can’t resist. I’d like to briefly explain what the Kibu Schema God is, how I set it up in a day, and how you might create something similar. What it is The Kibu Schema God (KSG) is a Custom GPT that helps me get immediate answers on my product’s data. It has full knowledge of my company’s database schema and context around it. KSG allows all Kibu employees with a basic understanding of SQL to construct queries that provide insights into our customers. Humbly put, it is an omniscient data deity that takes mortals’ plain-English requests and provides the path to the data in seconds. As a VP of Customer Success with an engineering background, I use KSG daily to gain insights into our customers’ product usage. Which organizations watched the most videos this week? How many time-tracking events occurred after 5 PM ET this month? Relative to ARR, which customers have the most alarmingly low usage? I can copy+paste these exact questions into KSG, and it will return exactly what I need. The beauty of KSG is that it’s completely disconnected from our actual database, ensuring privacy and HIPAA compliance. No customer, user, or health-related data is ever shared with Schema God or the LLM. Further, it took me just a few minutes to create, with occasional tweaking and maintaining- all without code. How it Works This morning, I wanted to know which users watched the most classes on Kibu (by the way, Kibu offers a library of 400+ videos of educational and exercise content for adults with special needs). So, I logged onto ChatGPT.com, went into my Kibu Schema God GPT, and asked the question: Instead of returning data, KSG generates a MySQL query. A query is a structured language that enables interaction with Kibu’s MySQL database. I then copy+paste that query into an SQL editor, like TablePlus, and view the results: Not only has KSG saved me hours of writing these tedious queries, but it’s also proven worthy in crafting some of the most complex, disgusting, 25+ line queries in my life. I used to think of SQL query writing as an art- now, it’s a commodity. Configuring KSG was relatively simple. When creating a Custom GPT, I provided the following instructions: You are helpful assistant for Kibu employees to better understand their customer. Kibu is a software tool that supports the IDD community. It offers a library of video classes to individuals and Disability Provider organizations, as well as an admin tool for organizations to take notes & attendance of their members (IDD individuals). Your job is to provide MySQL queries upon request given Kibu’s MySQL schema. Always use the provided Prisma schema in schema.txt when constructing a query. A schema is the structure that defines how a database is organized. It includes the tables, columns, data types, relationships, and other elements that shape how data is stored and accessed. Even a Google Sheet can have a schema. In the image below, the schema of this Google Sheet consists of a User table with five columns (ID, First Name, Last Name, Age, and State) and two other tables (Activity and Medical Info) that are likely related to the User table. Most production databases and SaaS providers maintain a document that defines your data schema. Kibu’s schema is explicitly defined with Prisma. Schemas are written in a structured way that makes them readable to computers but indecipherable to humans. This is the perfect recipe for an LLM use case. When creating KSG, I went to my dev team and requested our Prisma file. I uploaded it to the Kibu Schema God, giving it the blueprints to our database’s design. After explaining to the GPT a few nuances (what time zone our dates are in, what each “status” value means in a business context, etc.), KSG was complete. I occasionally tweak KSG’s configurations when the schema updates or more context needs added. How to Implement Your Own Schema God Schema Gods are an awesome way to unleash your data analytics potential with minimal IT overhead. Regardless of your role, you work with data, and you need to get insights from it. Here’s how you can build your own Schema God: 1. Identify your data source and find its schema For someone in Product or CS, this could be your relational database or a layer on top of it (Mixpanel, Amplitude). For a salesperson, your data is likely in a CRM. Ask the owner of this data source for the schema. Salesforce has its own schema tool that lets you view and configure all the objects in your org. 2. Insert the schema into ChatGPT. Visit ChatGPT.com (or your preferred LLM) and paste your schema into a Custom GPT configuration or start a new conversation. 3. Explain the schema to ChatGPT Think of your Schema God as a really smart data analyst intern who still needs to learn. Explain your product, its core “nouns”, and what a successful answer may look like. The more specific, the better. 4. Ask ChatGPT to return your queries in a desirable format. Every data repository has its own method of analyzing data. For a database, this will likely be query language. For SaaS apps, it might involve using an “advanced filter” language available in its reporting interface. It might be an API. Salesforce has its own query language called SOQL that runs on sites like Workbench. Find the format that gets you from copy -> paste -> data as quickly as possible. Final Thoughts In about an hour, my six years of SQL knowledge became nearly obsolete. Granted, building and tweaking the Schema God would have been much more challenging without my data fluency, and my more advanced prompts to KSG are still grounded in pseudo-SQL-speak. However, in its current state- with all the context and rules I’ve provided- I have complete confidence that it can help my non-technical colleagues with minimal mistakes. The best KSG users are those who understand the business of Kibu the most, not the codebase. Fuck man… maybe it was a good idea to get that business degree instead of computer science! This year, “talk to your data” apps have exploded in growth. But, I’m yet to find a tool as cheap, easy to use, and privacy-friendly as the Schema God. Hopefully, this can help some of you become the data-driven business visionary you never knew you could be.
Between 2009 and 2012, Apple iPhones and iPod Touches included a feature called “Send to YouTube” that allowed users to upload videos directly to YouTube from the Photos app. The feature worked… really well. In fact, YouTube reported a 1700% increase in total video uploads during the first half of 2009- crediting that growth to its strong integrative ties to Apple and social networks. However, this two-click upload feature was short-lived when Apple severed ties with YouTube by removing its homegrown app in 2012. While Send to YouTube can be thoroughly analyzed as a milestone on the “frenemy” timeline between Apple and Google, I want to explore a pleasant consequence of this moment. Apple uses the ‘IMG_XXXX’ naming convention for all images and videos captured on iOS devices, where XXXX is a unique sequence number¹. The first image you take is named “IMG_0001”, the second is “IMG_0002” and so on. During the Send to YouTube era of 2009 and 2012, the title of one’s YouTube video was defaulted to this naming convention. Unwitting content creators would then upload their videos on a public site with a barely-searchable name. To this day, there are millions of these videos. Try searching for “IMG_XXXX” on YouTube, replacing “XXXX” with your favorite numbers (I used my birthday, 0416). See what you get! There’s something surreal about these videos that engages you in a way you’ve never felt. None were edited, produced, or paraded for mass viewing. In fact, many were likely uploaded by accident or with a misunderstanding that complete strangers could see it. YouTube automatically removes harmful or violent content, so what remains exists in a unique, almost paradoxical state: forbidden, yet harmless. Putting all this together, searching IMG_XXXX offers the most authentic social feed ever seen on the Internet- in video, no less! While many videos are redundant snippets of a concerts, basketball games, or kids’ recitals, you also get one-of-a-kind videos that provides a glimpse into a complete stranger’s life. You’ll see a tumultuous event that made them, their partner, or their friend say, “hey, let’s record this”. I’d like to show you three of these videos that I found in my search. IMG_0416 (Mar 17, 2015) - 23 views The video shows a woman excitedly unboxing a book she received in the mail. From context clues, she seems to be a wife and mother from Memphis who’s unboxing the first published copy of her book. She thanks the friends, family, and publishers who made this happen. After a quick Google Search, I was able to find the book: A Profit / Prophet to Her Husband: Are you ready to be a wife? The book is meant “to help wives understand who they are and who they were designed to be.” It clocks in at 94 pages and has 30 ratings on Amazon! Go IMG_0416! I don’t care what you’re creating- I’m just a fan of creators. It looks like she kept at it- making a second book in 2020! IMG_0416.MOV (June 24, 2015) - 26 views The video appears to show a woman playing a matching card game that teaches you “the basics of the potash stuff” according to the cameraman. As the woman (who I assume is the cameraman’s supportive mother) flips two matching cards, she reads off the countries who produce the most potash. I honestly didn’t know anything about potash! Turns out that it is a mineral with large amount of potassium, which is helpful as a plant fertilizer. With Canada producing the largest reserves in the world, the vast majority of Canadian potash is found in Saskatchewan. I wonder if this family lives in Canada. Or, if this is just another school project of useless facts… I miss those! IMG_0416 (Feb 8, 2011) - 114 views Let’s end on a fun one. The video shows a young man snorting powdered sugar and dealing with the consequences of it. Given his BU hoodie, Dunkin’ Donuts location, and ironic depiction of drug use, I gotta say this is a VERY Boston video. What’s genuinely heartwarming is the shared laughter between the man, the camerawoman, and the motherly figure leaving Dunkin’. The camerawoman calls her “Myra”, suggesting they all know each other. We have nothing better to do, so we’re snorting powdered sugar captures an essence of suburban America that I’m sure many of us can relate to. Edit: 11/3/24 IMG_0417 (Mar 14, 2014) - 16 views I found this after posting, and it’s just too amazing to not include… a woman filming her partner as he finds out she’s pregnant. Assuming all has gone well, the child is now almost 10 years old. I wonder if the family even knows this video still exists. After posting this on Hackernews, it looks like somebody commented on the video lol. I hope the family receives a notification it and is able to share this with their kid. ¹ Edit: The IMG_XXXX sequence isn’t truly unique—after 10,000 photos, the numbering restarts at IMG_0001 (Source).
I just finished reading The Inner Game of Tennis by Tim Gallwey. Originally published in 1974, the book explores how the thoughts of an athlete affect their game. It’s lauded as being at the forefront of what we now call “sports psychology”. Although my competitive sports days are over, I was still intrigued to read it in context of my current life as a startup professional, rec basketball player, and coach. Here are a few takeaways that I have from the book. To preface, Gallwey talks a lot about Self 1 and Self 2. Put simply, Self 1 is the critical, judgmental voice in your head, while Self 2 is the instinctive, natural self that performs effortlessly when trusted. The goal is to remove Self 1 as much as possible so Self 2 can perform. How to Learn “To Self 2, a picture is worth a thousand words. It learns by watching the actions of others, as well as by performing actions itself… The benefits to your game come not from analyzing the strokes of top players, but from concentrating without thinking and simply letting yourself absorb the images before you.” Gallwey argues that every human is encoded with a natural learning process. This process allows babies to walk long before their parents could explain it to them. The key activity of observing a successful outcome with your eyes, ears, and nose is more effective than any technical explanation. I remember watching countless highlights of Shane Battier and Andre Dawkins as a kid- just trying to imitate their exact basketball shots. I would go as far as to open my mouth and scrunch my eyebrows in the same position as their posters on my wall. No one had to explicitly tell me to jump with my legs, position my hands, and flick my wrist; simply observing Battier and Dawkins taught my Self 2 to do it without me realizing. Relating this to career, it’s important to observe those who you aspire to be. In addition to reading books from those at the top, there’s value in being in the room where it happens. This is one reason young professionals should consider starting at large organizations. At Google, one can see how their Senior Directors react to pain, pleasure, choices, and adversity. Talent rubs off, and proximity to leadership is a great way to become a better professional without needing to take a single note. A good coach will encourage their student to find a mentor whom they can observe. Once the observation period ends, the coach should not ask the student what they observed. That’s that trap of Self 1. Rather, the student should immedaitely act and trust that Self 2’s naturally encoded learning will lead to them success. Thinking While Performing “Before hitting the next set of balls, I asked Joan, ‘This time I want you to focus your mind on the seams of the ball. Don’t think about making contact. In fact, don’t try to hit the ball at all.” It’s happened too many times in my golf game; I’d pick up a new, exciting feeling on the driving range, codify those feelings into rules, then enact those rules on the course… only to disastrous results. Creating rigid, conscious rules is a Self 1 exercise that prevents Self 2 from effortless performance. People often misinterpret “thinking” for “performing”. Thus, if you do not think about your newest backswing, you will not do it. However, if you trust the learning process of observing, feeling, and experiencing, you will build a muscle memory that goes beyond any thought. At the beginning of every spring, I would pick up my clubs and play some golf. I always play well in my first couple rounds. And, it used to piss me off! I would think, wow, I must be really bad at practicing if rusty Ben always plays better than golf-every-day Ben. But, I now realize that “rusty” is a poor word. This version of me doesn’t overthink. It is a version that has had time to hibernate and naturally encode all my greatest golf habits (and forget the others). To keep Self 1 from creeping in, Gallwey suggests focusing on something harmless, like the seams of the ball. This keeps Self 1 occupied and lets Self 2 take control. You’re not thinking about what to do with the seams—you’re just acknowledging them. Calm your mind, trust your body. You’re more talented than you think! Competing Against Others “It is the duty of your opponent to create the greatest possible difficulties for you, just as it is yours to try to create obstacles for him. Only by doing this do you give each other the opportunity to find out to what heights each can rise… Instead of hoping your opponent is going to double-fault, you actually wish that he’ll get it in. This desire helps you achieve a better mental state of returning it.” This is a great way to reframe “challenge” as “opportunity.” Whether you’re competing against another person, the environment (a golf course, the stock market), or yourself, pressure is a privilege. If I see a great tennis player on the other side of the net, I ought to smile, as it’s an opportunity to prove to Self 1 that Self 2 is even more awesome than he thinks! I’ll admit, I’ve lost some of my competitive edge since entering the workforce. My competitors are less often other people and more often internal feelings—fear, change, complacency. But I’m starting to see that competitive joy can still be found in these areas too. When I face a difficult situation at work, it’s an opportunity to improve and sharpen my skills. Judging Yourself “Why shouldn’t a beginning player treat his backhand as a loving mother would her child? The trick is to not identify with the backhand. If you view an erratic backhand as a reflection of who you are, you will be upset. But you are not your backhand any more than a parent is his child… Remember that you are not your tennis game. You are not your body. Trust the body to learn and play, as you worst trust another person to do a job… Let the flower grow.” It’s easy to see performance as a reflection of your character or work ethic. A big part of my personality that I’m working on is how negative outcomes in one area of my life tend to impact others. I’ve heard the saying, “would you talk to a friend that way?” and how I should separate my mistakes from my self-worth as a human. This is essentially Gallwey’s advice, although I found his perspective much more optimistic and constructive. First, one must detach the activity from the human. You are not your tennis game. Once you do that, you can see your game for what it is- a living entity that’s filled with potential, secrets, and passion. Go off and explore! That said, I struggle with this idea when it comes to my career. Perhaps I’m too American, but I find it hard to say, “You are not your career,” and mean it. Since college, I’ve expected that my accomplishments, my friends, the places I’d live, and even the women I’d date would spawn from my career and the experiences within it. I think many young professionals feel the same way. This makes detaching from outcomes difficult, and it’s something I still need to think about.
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Friends and relatives, people whose judgment I actually trust, have urged me to move Anecdotal Evidence from Blogger to Substack and I don’t understand why. All I need is a place to write, the “platform” is of no importance. I’d do this in a notebook, like in the old days, if nothing else were available. Blogger is temperamental but after almost twenty years I’ve learned her funny little ways. As in a long, mostly happy marriage, one gets comfortable. I think of Michael Oakeshott’s definition of being conservative: “. . . to prefer the familiar to the unknown, to prefer the tried to the untried, fact to mystery, the actual to the possible, the limited to the unbounded, the near to the distant, the sufficient to the superabundant, the convenient to the perfect, present laughter to utopian bliss.” I didn’t retire after almost half a century as a newspaper reporter and science writer – a professional -- in order to “monetize.” In 1903, G.K. Chesterton wrote a brief monograph on Robert Browning as part of the English Men of Letters series. In Chapter IV, “Browning in Italy,” Chesterton describes the poet’s devotion to painting, his dedication to “the obstetrics of art,” which enabled him to write poems about painters and their work: “He was, in other words, what is called an amateur. The word amateur has come by the thousand oddities of language to convey an idea of tepidity; whereas the word itself has the meaning of passion. Nor is this peculiarity confined to the mere form of the word; the actual characteristic of these nameless dilettanti is a genuine fire and reality. A man must love a thing very much if he not only practises it without any hope of fame or money, but even practises it without any hope of doing it well. Such a man must love the toils of the work more than any other man can love the rewards of it. Browning was in this strict sense a strenuous amateur. He tried and practised in the course of his life half a hundred things at which he can never have even for a moment expected to succeed.” Even a professional can be an amateur.
Becky Chambers’ gentle sci-fi on the right amount of carbon, AC, airplanes, and yachts.
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Two intellectual memoirs dominated my reading over Spring, three if WG Sebald's Silent Catastrophes can be included given that its analysis of the careers of various Austrian writers illuminates Sebald's own literary trajectory.1 Peter Brown's Journeys of a Mind: A Life in History is over 700 pages but remains fascinating upto and including the final page, and while Giorgio Agamben's Self-Portrait in the Studio is over 500 pages shorter, reading it again only multiplies the pleasure. All three writers display a commitment to their research not limited to a 9-to-5 academic career. It is embedded in their lives;2 the two surviving authors are still working in their 80s. But why did they dominate my reading? I wondered if it was a vicarious living of an alternative life, the one in which I was able to dedicate my time to reading and writing, perhaps to enable a more satisfying production. I daydream of the garden offices I see advertised in my Instagram feed in which I might escape distraction and finally concentrate after decades of superficiality. The archive of this blog reveals a movement from naive enthusiasms and bitter agitations to more ambitious content that doesn't quite escape the original form and may in fact diminish its strengths. At its best, blog writing glances at subjects, whether that is a new book or literary current affair, acting as the corner of an eye catching sight of something regular coverage blanks out, while, at its worst, it merely imitates.3 Ultimately, however, it remains a dilettantism. It doesn't nourish. At least, that is what I have felt. Then I reread the passage in Self-Portrait in the Studio in which Agamben writes of a postcard on his studio desk of a 17th century painting depicting a woman feeding from her own breast.4 After acknowledging its 'cloying lineage', he argues for it as an allegory of the soul nourishing itself. He asks what it means to nourish oneself: "What is a light that feeds itself? A flame that no longer needs fuel?" In the process of nourishing—in any kind of nourishing, spiritual or bodily—there is a threshold at which the process reverses direction and turns back towards itself. Food can nourish only if at a certain point it is no longer something other than us, only if we have—as they say—assimilated it; but this means—to the exactly the same degree—that we are assimilated to it. The same thing happens with the light of knowledge: it always arises from outside, but there arrives a moment when inside and outside meet and we can no longer tell them apart. At this point, the fire ceases to consume us, 'it now consumes itself'.5 This, I realised, was why these books had dominated. Each in its way marks multiple crossings of thresholds, the meetings of inside and outside, and I was drawn to these books because I was aware that I had been impatient for such a threshold to make itself known and want to know how others had climbed above the shameful lowlands of secondary writing. Like so many others, I had sought assimilation in the consumption of ideas, washing down the keywords and catchphrases of philosophy, literary criticism and critical theory like so many pills, downloaded using the convenient shortcuts technology offers, but which map only the landscape of the outside. No meeting ever arrives. Ten years ago when I read Nathaniel Davis' translation of 'Across the Border', Sebald's beautiful essay on Peter Handke's Repetition, a novel that had dazzled me in the late 1980s alongside Slow Homecoming, Across, and The Afternoon of a Writer, I was also dazzled. I had read the novel several times was frustrated each time that I couldn't find words to express why it and the three other novels had stood out above almost everything else I had read,6 and Sebald's essay only deepened the frustration as it focuses on the novel's metaphysical ideas, its mythological scheme, and its relation to the theme of 'Heimat' in Austrian literature and Filip Kobal's quest for redemption from the inheritance of fascist violence; that is, nothing much to do with me, but did help me to understand "the particular light which filters through" the novel, the words Sebald uses to describe Handke's prose in Repetition. The light made "the text itself a place of refuge among the arid zones" and "by the power of words alone" made visible "a world more beautiful than this one". Reading Jo Catling's translation of the essay in a book we have waited for two decades and on which I hope to write more, I realised the larger issues had over those years become embedded in me, so familiar that I could set them aside to concentrate on what really nourishes, perhaps refuge, beauty and redemption. This is another reason why the books dominated: they emphasised the value of finding what such nourishment rather than trying to assimilate the food that passes right through. Assimilation may take a lifetime to arrive, but, as Blanchot says: "The shortcut does not allow one to arrive someplace more directly (more quickly), but rather to lose the way that ought to lead there." Notes Terry Pitts' two-part review of the collection is especially good on this.↩ This becomes clear in the remarkable final section of Agamben's What I saw, heard, learned in which he remembers a note he wrote as a child that "seemed to be the secret core of my philosophy"↩ All these years later I still cringe at the memory of when the Litblog Co-Op, set up to promote formally adventurous fiction and challenge the conservative coverage of print newspapers, announced its first 'Read This!' promotion as Kate Atkinson's best-selling novel Case Histories with the co-op member referring to the author as "a juicy pro", as if novelists were gymnasts and the novel a pommel horse.↩ The painting by Giovanni Serodine is given the title as Allegory of Science by the Kunsthistorisches Museum, but most other sources refer to it as Allegorical Female Figure.↩ Agamben is quoting Plato's Seventh Letter on which he bases the claim.↩ I wrote a blogpost on three of the four and another on Handke's book-length poem To Duration also written in the mid-1980s but didn't appear in English translation for another 25 years.↩
I fight the urge to wallow in nostalgia but it seeps back in like moisture in an unfinished basement. I take that image from my childhood home. The walls and floor were bare concrete. Stacks of newspaper and lumber felt flesh-like with dampness. Down there it was always chilly, even in summer. The poet Jane Greer is seventy-two and lives in North Dakota. For twelve years, she edited the Plains Poetry Journal. She is a poet of domesticity and technical rigor, Midwestern in her good-humored seriousness, a Roman Catholic who reveres the wonder of creation. I’m from Ohio, a semi-Midwestern state, but there’s nothing homogenous about the Midwest and its people. She’s rural, I’m urban/suburban. Most of the stereotypes don’t hold, though Midwesterners indulge them and laugh. I remember being surprised when a buddy and I got lost in Illinois trying to outrun a tornado that never happened. We found ourselves in Lewiston, where Edgar Lee Masters moved with his family at age twelve. It served as his model for Spoon River. And the surrounding fields of corn felt almost claustrophobic. I read Those Days: An American Album By Richard Critchfield (1931-94) when it was published in 1986. Like Greer, Critchfield was a North Dakota native, and the book recounts his family’s history in that state and Iowa. I remember associating it with Willa Cather and Wright Morris. Greer, I discovered, reviewed the book in the April 1987 issue of Chronicles, and it begins with a passage any writer would be delighted to hear: “This is a book I wish I’d written, a love story of the largest and best kind. Like most people, I remember my childhood, that eternal summer, in a glow of happy forgetfulness, simply out of pleasure. Richard Critchfield ‘remembers,’ as if he had been there, his parents' lives and society before he was born, and shows why it’s important to remember and to go back even further than our own birth: Because like it or not, we are attached. We are not historyless like Adam, breathed out of nothing; we’re drawn from the narrow end of a real and compelling vortex—history—vivid with blood and bone, passion and fear, as it touches down to make us in the here and now. Part of everything that was and will be, we move up the funnel of history to make room for those whose history we will be.” I envy Critchfield’s reconstruction of his family’s history, in part because most of mine is a blank. I know almost nothing about my father’s family and only unconnected shards about my mother’s. These people didn’t talk about the past, whether out of guilt or abject indifference, and bequeathed little living memory to their descendants. I’m left with all the questions I didn’t ask. “This is no vague nostalgic trek back to the nonexistent ‘good old days,’” Greer writes, “or mere homage to a loved mother, but a gifted writer’s careful examination of all available resources, to reconstruct the rhythm and immediacy of the past—its sounds and smells, human passions and disappointments. Critchfield has resuscitated those days, given them breath and pulse, and made their relevance to us, now, evident.” Here is “The Light As Thick As Clover Honey,” the first poem in Greer’s third collection, The World as We Know It Is Falling Away (Lambing Press, 2022): ‘Here is the square pink house on the green street. Here is the long back yard sloped to the alley. Here is the rusty swing, and here is the pup-tent bleaching the grass. Here is the happy family like all the others. Here is the sunburnt child on her blue bike whose streamers are the reins of a great stallion; here they gallop the world from home to grandmother’s and home again on odd brick streets, around the painted bandstand, through the gap in in the church’s high trimmed hedge. Here is the small town hugging the river bend, cicadas rasping out their alien urge, the light as thick as clover honey. Here it is always summer, always the golden hour.” “Eternal summer” in the review, “it is always summer” in Greer’s poem.